Free Off the Cuff by Carson Kressley

it’s a very different animal, mon frère . The polo shirt is meant to be a little more tailored and sophisticated. I know this might come as a shock, but a golf shirt is meant for playing golf. It has a very specific function and fit, like roominess in the shoulders and waist to allow for lots of twisting in the torso. The sleeve goes to the elbow, because if you were wearing a regular polo shirt while teeing off, a lot of your arm would show. And that might not be so much fun for your fellow players. Personally, I don’t golf, but I like to dress up and pretend I’m golfing, just so I can wear the clothes. As long as the clothes are cute, keep swinging away, people!
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    The knit shirt is also an area where the straight guy should be cautious and not fall victim to the lure of the free shirt. Why? Well, there’s a reason they’re free. You get what you pay for, silly!

    A lot of companies give out free knit shirts with corporate logos. Bad idea. You don’t want to look like you’re renting shoes at a bowling alley or driving the tram to the Tinkerbell Lot at Disney World. Unless you are. And there’s no shame in that, kids.
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    While it pains me greatly, I realize that some of you may have to wear these logoed knit shirts at the annual trade show or as part of your daily uniform. But don’t let me catch you in them Friday after five. Like a hooker after sunup, those things better go into hiding.

T- SHIRTS
    There’s nothing sexier than a clean, nicely broken-in, cuddly white cotton crewneck T-shirt worn with jeans, a charismatic belt, and some loafers. I think that’s hot. You’re done. It’s so very James Dean. If you buy some well-fitted, high-quality T-shirts to wear alone or layer under other things—three in white, three in black, and three in heathered gray—that’s the most bang for $7.50 a pop that you’ll ever have, unless there’s a trip to Thailand in your future.
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    Just like most things, I don’t really care where you buy them. The Gap is fine. Old Navy is fine. As long as it’s hefty, nice cotton with a well-constructed ribbed collar, it’s going to look great. But once again, I’m not talking about underwear T-shirts that are sheer enough to show your nipples. Wrong answer. (See chapter two on underwear.)
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    You might also want to season your wardrobe—pepper it, if it you will—with a few novelty shirts. There’s been a big vintage T-shirt craze that’s swept our great nation. They’re available everywhere. But what made the vintage ones great was the quirkiness of their design, the logos, the color schemes, or the quizzical commercial mottoes. When those great old designs are knocked off and reproduced en masse by major corporate retailers, they lose their panache. When every guy on the street has the same faux vintage Larry’s Lube Stop tee that he bought at the mall for $18.99, it’s no longer hip. So why get an imposter when you can have the real thing? A quick visit to the local Goodwill, or to a more upscale thrift store, and you can find great, broken-in, soft, cuddly vintage tees for pennies on the dollar of what you’d pay at a “full retail” store. And they’re authentic, which is the key word. A good rule of thumb, by the way, is to avoid any clothing that actually says the word “authentic” on it.

SWEATERS
    Sweaters are an important part of any guy’s wardrobe. A few sweaters will really go a long way, especially if you invest in flattering colors. (Hint: Taupey, flesh-toned colors just don’t look good on anyone. Matching your clothes to your skin tone is a really bad idea.) A fine-gauge sweater is a great way to look dressed up without wearing a woven shirt or a sport coat. It’s perfect for dates.
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    You should definitely have a few crewneck sweaters. The crewneck is versatile because it can look fantastic with a T-shirt or