it’s freaking her out.
“I don’t like this. Drop me off, I’ll walk up.”
“I’m not dropping you off. Just relax.”
She looks nervously behind us. “I’m afraid we’re gonna slide backwards and—”
“Stop it. I’m not going to let us slide backwards.”
“But what if you can’t control it?”
I shoot her an annoyed look and she turns away as I accelerate a little, making the tires spin. She makes a few indescribable noises and grips the seat, but after a few seconds of sliding sideways, we get traction and continue upwards. When I finally pull around to the garage she lets out a long breath like she was holding it in the entire time. “Told ya,” I say smugly as I put the car in park so I can go open the garage door.
“Yeah, you did, didn’t you?”
I glance up at her as I get out to see if this was sarcasm, but she’s already scooting over into my seat. We’ve got this down to a routine, I guess.
She smiles at me again. Like she trusts me completely even though three seconds ago she thought I was gonna let us slide backwards down a steep hill. I open the garage and she pulls forward with the same careful attention she did earlier, and then I close the door behind her. I start grabbing bags and she messes with the baby.
I set all the bags down on the kitchen island and start taking things out to put away.
“Nope,” she says in a light tone. She walks over to me and puts her hand on my chest to push me away, and then grabs the bag with her other hand at the same time. “You paid, so I’ll put it all away and cook us dinner.”
I try to remove her hand from my chest, but she whirls around before I can even come to grips with the fact that she touched me again .
Fucking girl. That’s three times now.
“Go,” she says. “Shoo. I’ll take care of it.”
“Shoo?” I chuckle. It feels good to laugh after all this bullshit that’s been rattling around in my brain these past few months. “I can cook. I don’t need you to take care of me.”
She stops what she’s doing and looks over her shoulder at me. “Just go, OK? I got this. It’s my way of paying you back. Don’t ruin it for me.”
She goes back to the bags and leaves me to decide. I watch her from behind for a moment. Her small body is busy as she takes things out and sets them on the counter. And then the baby whines and it breaks the hold this girl has on me.
I don’t exactly hate babies, they just freak me out. They’re all needy with the feeding and the diapers. Plus, most of them like to be touched.
I shiver at the thought and make a quick escape before she asks me to do her a baby favor.
Chapter Ten
I head downstairs immediately. This is the front of the house and it’s not your typical dark basement. For one, it’s got a whole wall of windows on the far end of the lower floor great room, and for two, it’s a walk-out basement, so it’s built into the side of the mountain. If it wasn’t dark I’d be enjoying a spectacular view of the mountain peeking out from the tall pine trees. There’s no skiing on the mountain we face, it’s just wilderness. I prefer it. I can imagine nothing worse than looking out the window and seeing tourists.
I drag my gaze away from the dark window and look to the left at my dad’s office door. I haven’t been back here since the day he died. And as Mrs. Pearson pointed out to me this morning, I even missed the funeral.
I don’t do funerals. I don’t do weddings, or baby showers, or anniversaries.
I did one birthday. For Rook. I did Ronin’s get-out-of-jail-free party. Again, for Rook. And I’ve been to Antoine’s New Year’s party twice, including yesterday. The first was to get drunk with Spencer and Ronin after Mardee died. A formal goodbye from the three of us. And last night was to say goodbye to Rook. A last-ditch attempt to disconnect whatever it is we have between us.
I flick the light on in my dad’s office and take it in. Books on shelves,