Free Selby's Stardom by Duncan Ball

talked.’
    â€˜So I can talk,’ Selby said. ‘Get over it. What medicine do you need?’
    The man’s eyes rolled up in his head and he slumped back to the floor, unconscious.
    â€˜I’ve got to get an ambulance!’ Selby said as he grabbed the phone and dialled 000.
    Within minutes, Selby could hear the sound of the siren approaching. The old man opened his eyes again.
    â€˜How’d you learn how to talk?’ he asked.
    â€˜I don’t know. I was watching TV,’ Selby said. ‘Anyway, don’t tell anyone, okay?’
    â€˜You mean, no one else knows?’
    â€˜Not even my owners.’

    â€˜Why not?’
    â€˜Because I don’t want them to make me do housework.’
    The old man looked around the room.
    â€˜So who cleaned up around here?’
    â€˜Me, but don’t tell anyone that either. Promise?’
    â€˜Nobody would believe me anyway,’ Dave said. ‘I guess you don’t want to live here with me, do you?’
    â€˜No, I’m afraid not.’
    â€˜But those nutters you live with are going to put you down.’
    â€˜They’d never do a thing like that,’ Selby said. ‘They’re wonderful people. Mrs Trifle only said that to get you to look after me for a while. She thought I’d be good for you.’
    Digger Dave laughed but the laugh turned into a cough.
    â€˜Good for me? Well I guess you were, too.’
    Just then the ambulance attendants came through the door. They spoke to Digger Dave and then put him on a stretcher to take him to hospital. Selby heard the old man call out, ‘Thanks, Selby!’ And then to the attendants, ‘That dog talks, you know.’
    â€˜We’ll have you in hospital in a couple of minutes,’ one of the men said.
    â€˜See ya, Selby,’ Dave called out again.
    â€˜See you, Digger Dave,’ Selby thought.
    â€˜So what became of Digger Dave?’ Dr Trifle asked Mrs Trifle a week later.
    â€˜He’s gone, I’m afraid.’
    Selby looked up from where he was resting.
    â€˜Gone?’ Dr Trifle said. ‘What do you mean, gone?’
    â€˜Gone to live with his daughter in the city. She had no idea he was ill and needed looking after. He got a lot better in hospital and then she came and got him. He must have been delirious with fever, I’m afraid. He said that Selby cleaned his house for him. Isn’t that a scream? And that isn’t all. He reckons that Selby must have rung his daughter to tell her to come and get him because he said that he didn’t do it.’
    â€˜Goodness me,’ Dr Trifle said, looking over at Selby. ‘I guess Selby is cleverer than we thought.’
    A tiny smile flickered across Selby’s lips.
    â€˜I certainly am,’ he thought. ‘I certainly am.’

Selby’s Grand Pree
    It was midnight and most of Bogusville was asleep. Even Dr Trifle, who often worked late on his inventions, was dreaming, though his dreams were full of gizmos and gadgets.
    Selby was in Dr Trifle’s workroom sitting at a computer game console with a helmet strapped to his head.
    On the side of the console it said ‘Grand Pree Simulator’. The helmet had a visor that Selby had pulled down over his eyes so that he could watch the images within.
    Selby was holding a steering wheel in front of him, turning it violently from side to side or spinning it halfway round and then back again.
    He worked the floor pedals and gearstick just like a professional race-car driver.
    The headphones hidden inside the helmet were alive with the roar of engines and the crash of cars as, one by one, Selby made his way through to the front of the pack. There was only one car between Selby and the finish line. Normally Selby was very careful to pay attention to where the Trifles were but not tonight. He was totally caught up in the excitement of the race — all he had to do was pass the last car and he’d win the