Free Pam by Jacqueline Druga

“Let’s go look. If he isn’t, we’ll hang out by his bike. He’s gotta come back for that.”
    I agreed. It was a Friday night , and I wanted to see Richie. I wanted to kiss him. I loved kissing Richie. It was our senior year, and I knew it wouldn’t be long before I was ‘with’ him. He was going to be my first. There was no one else I wanted to be with. But until then, I enjoyed making out with Richie.
    I was wearing my best pair of Jordache j eans, a cool blouse, my hair was big and perfect, and Sharon let me use her lipstick. My father never let me wear lip gloss, but Sharon, she always had makeup. She was beautiful and confident and didn’t care. I wished at times I could be like her. She had experience. And before we went anywhere, she always put stuff on my face.
    Boys loved her. I often thought it was because she did things others didn’t. She told me about them , but it made me embarrassed .
    “Think of it a education,” she used to tell me and giggle.
    Anyhow we went to look for Richie. Certain he and other boys were under the bleachers, we headed that way as the stadium emptied out.
    We didn’t hear the typical laughter of kids. Then again, if they were sneaking beer, they’d be quiet.
    As we veered from the group of exiting people, I heard something .
    Sharon whispered . “I hear him.”
    “You think that’s him?” I asked.
    “Yeah, let’s sneak up and scare them.”
    I giggled. It was a great idea. Hunched over, we moved as quickly and quietly as we could toward the voice.
    Perhaps if we would have made noise, we would have seen something totally different.
    A part of me wished we were loud.
    Mouths open , ready to call out, ‘Hold it.’, I froze. I literally froze.
    Richie was under the bleacher. Connie Lambert leaned against the pillar , moving side to side, trying to be cute. Smiling and giggling. “ So you wanna see?”
    “Hell , yeah. You know it.” Richie leaned into her, pressed his body against Connie and kissed her . H e kissed her long and hard like he never kissed me. H e then moved his lips to her neck and his hand grabbed on to her breast.
    Sharon stepped forward, and I pulled her back. I just wanted to leave. Run and leave. Cry my eyes out the second I was away,
    His hand moved from her breasts to her waist then her leg. It slid up her cheerleading skirt and in between her thighs .
    She giggled an d pushed aw ay his hand, shoving him back.
    “You said I could see,” he said.
    She laughed again, biting her lip. “And you can.” She grabbed her skirt and lifted it. “See ? ”
    “Can I take them off?”
    Connie nodded.
    Richie dropped to his knees in a second, reached up , and grabbed her panties. He slid them down to her ankles and stared at her.
    That’s about all he could do. Because Sharon yelled out.
    “You asshole!”
    Quickly Richie turned his head. Connie screa med a little scream of surprise , bent over and pulled up her underwear. She did it so fast; I don’t think she realized a part of her skirt was stuck in her briefs.
    “Asshole!” Sharon raged toward Richie.
    “Sharon, let’s go.” I sobbed. “I sa w it all.”
    “It ain’t what you think.” Richie stood.
    “Ain’t what we think!” Sharon blasted. “We saw you with her. We saw you kissing her. Touching her.” She spun and pointed to Connie. “And you aren’t nothing but a slut.”
    “Richie, I gotta go, ” s he said.
    H e nodded.
    Arms folded tight to her body, she hurried away, pausing only to look at me as she did.
    “Talk to him,” Sharon told me, “I’ll be right back.”
    I looked over my shoulder to see her heading in the same direction as Connie, but then I turned around to Richie. “How can you do this to me?”
    “Do what to you? I wasn’t doing anything.” He kicked the dirt with his foot, not looking at me. He paused and then sighed out. “Sorry, Pammy. I am.”
    “Why did you do it?”
    “ Because you don’t.” Richie shook his head.
    I felt bad, really bad