Free A Phule and His Money by Robert Asprin, Peter J. Heck

looking at Phule.
    "Yes, of course I was notified," said Phule. "General Blitzkrieg informed me some time back."
    "And he made my mission transparent?"
    Phule had to think for a beat before answering, "Yes, it was quite clear. You were coming to study our tactics...and ethics, I believe the general said. Now that I think about it, I'm not certain I entirely understood that last part."
    "Ah, but is it not self-evident, Captain Clown? Our races seek to conclude a treaty, and of course this would be a good thing. But we Zenobians want to know with whom we are about to treat, and what they are likely to do, and even more serious, whether they are likely to do what they say they will do. So I have come to study your company to learn all these things."
    It was impossible to read Qual's expression, and the translator was shaky at rendering the nuances of his tone. Phule wondered suddenly what would happen if Qual reported that the humans were untrustworthy. That was a sobering thought. Any number of very unpleasant results might follow a very simple misunderstanding with this alien envoy... He began to wonder if General Blitzkrieg had somehow manipulated him into this situation.
    Rembrandt had picked up the same train of thought. She paused with her wineglass in midair and asked, "Flight Leftenant, does this mean that your report on our company is going to determine whether or not your people will sign a treaty with us?"
    The Zenobian gulped down another chunk of raw seafood-his teeth were undeniably formidable-looking-and said, equably, "To be sure, Lieutenant, we place great gravity on trust and ethics. Of course, I am but one observer; there are others visiting your leaders in trade, in political realms-it is of importance that we know enough to decide wisely. Of course, it was felicitous that Captain Clown was the first of your species to meet us-his generosity opened the dining coop for what we hope will continue to be a very beneficial relationship." He popped a handful of shrimp into his mouth and grinned-at least Phule hoped it was a grin. Except for his impeccably fitted Legion uniform, the alien resembled nothing quite so much as a miniature allosaur. The display of all those teeth might mean anything at all.
    But Qual's stated intentions were benign, and he was an official envoy of his species. Until there was evidence to the contrary, Phule and his officers would have to take him at his word. Even if Qual's table manners were not exactly comfortable to observe at close range...
    The dinner had left Phule very satisfactorily fed-along with a couple of glasses of excellent wine (Boordy Grand Cru Blanc, of an excellent vintage). It would have been tempting, after his event-filled day, for the captain to make an early night of it. But he had promised his officers he was not going to neglect the looming crises. He'd stop off in Comm Central, find out if there had been any new developments, and then see if he had any bright ideas for dealing with them.
    He had turned down the corridor to his destination and gone half a dozen strides when a voice from a shadowed alcove whispered to him: "Captain!"
    Phule turned and peered into the shadows, where a slim figure in civilian clothes lurked. "Sushi!" he said, anger in his voice. "What's going on? Do you know what's been happening around here?"
    "Some of it, sure, Captain," said Sushi, putting a finger to his lips. "Keep it down, though-we haven't got time to get anyplace more private, and if the wrong people overhear me, I'm in deep kimchee."
    "Some of us are beginning to think you're the wrong people," growled Phule, but he stepped into the alcove and lowered his voice. "Tell me everything-and it better be good."
    "It is good, Captain, very good," said Sushi, but there was a worried look on his face. "You've heard about the couple that came to the casino this afternoon?"
    "Yes. We still have the woman in custody, last I heard."
    "Oh, yeah," said Sushi. "That reminds me, you can let