Angelo’s shoulder. I watched as his boyfriend leant in to him, his gaze full of adoration.
‘I am!’ I waved my hand.
‘Not me,’ Dad said. ‘I’m spending the morning with the papers and a pot of coffee.’
‘I’m with your father on that one,’ Gina said. ‘And I still have some presents to wrap.’
‘Mum?’ Karl patted Esther’s arm.
‘Oh no, darling. I have far too much to do here.’
‘It’ll be a bit busy for the kids on Christmas Eve.’ Sam wrinkled his nose. ‘So I’d better stay here. They both hate crowded shops.’ He smiled but I could sense disappointment.
‘Well I have an idea,’ Mum spoke up. ‘I have lots of baking to do and I could really use some help.’
Oh no!
I should have offered to stay but I still had a few last-minute gifts to get. Especially now that Sam and the children were here. I ought to get them something. I glanced at Mum but she wasn’t looking in my direction.
‘What do you think, Jack and Holly? Can you make gingerbread men?’
She was asking the children so that Sam could go into town. Well done, Esther! Was she coming out on the other side of the menopause with a brand-new heart?
‘Yes please!’ Holly shouted. ‘Can I, Daddy?’
‘I don’t know. Are you sure, Esther? I mean, won’t they get under your feet?’
‘Not at all.’ Mum smiled and her eyes actually lit up. ‘I’d love to have their company.’
‘Can I make gingerbread soldiers instead?’ Jack asked.
‘If you like.’ Esther raised her eyebrows, probably wondering how she’d create that particular shape and if they’d have to have guns.
‘Okay. Thank you, Esther. I’ll owe you.’ Sam flashed Mum a smile and she waved her hand at him. She always did have a soft spot for him, and she was really disappointed when Sam and I split up. But she’d also said that in light of what had happened, it might be best for both of us.
‘No trouble at all, Sam. Come on then, team. Into the kitchen we go.’
‘I’ll just take Sportacus and Stephanie on a quick walk then I’ll be ready,’ Sam said.
‘We just need to brush our teeth,’ Karl said and he and Angelo headed upstairs. I tried not to notice how Karl patted Angelo’s backside. I hoped they weren’t off for a quickie. Dad and Gina went into the drawing room and I was left alone with Sam.
‘What’s up, Katie?’
‘Huh?’
‘You’re nervous.’
‘No I’m not.’
‘You are. You’re twisting your hair. You always do that when you’re nervous.’
‘Oh.’
‘So what is it?’
‘Sam?’
‘Yeah?’ He ran a large hand through his hair and I followed it, wishing I could trace its path.
‘Who are Stephanie and Sportacus?’
‘Come with me,’ he replied, then took my hand and pulled me towards the front door.
The air was clear and crisp outside and I took deep, greedy breaths of it, savouring how it chilled my throat and made my nose tingle. We skidded and slipped our way down the driveway until we got to the elm tree arch, then Sam took a sharp left onto a snow-covered path that I hadn’t noticed the day before. We walked around a bordering hedge, then a pretty building came into view. It was made of the same red brick as the manor but was much smaller. It had ivy growing up one side of its double front and smoke poured from the chimney, suggesting that a real fire burned invitingly inside.
‘This is the lodge,’ Sam said.
‘It’s cute.’
It’s not a puppy, Katie!
He was still holding my hand and the warmth of his palm seared into mine, making me almost forget about how cold the rest of me was. It felt so natural, so comfortable and so right. But that was silly. How could it be right? There was nothing between us except for memories.
When we reached the door, he unlocked it, then stood back to allow me to go in. He’d done that last night too. He was good looking and a gentleman; I’d forgotten so much. Or had I just not allowed myself to remember?
I walked into a cosy hallway and felt