Free The Adultress by Philippa Carr

manager and the purpose of them. Perhaps I imagined that because I was becoming caught up in a situation which would have seemed impossible to me before I set foot in this house.
    “My dear, it was good of you to come.”
    “I’m glad I did.”
    “And I’m rather glad that you came alone. Your husband might not have understood so readily.”
    “Oh … I am sure he would … Tell me what it is I have to understand.”
    “Come and sit near the bed, so that I can see you. Ah, you have a look of Clarissa. A dear good girl … always. I think the women are the backbone of the family. … The men … they have their weaknesses but the women have been strong. But let us get down to business, shall we? We must make the most of what time we have. My dear, I want you to help me make my will.”
    “Oh.”
    “Yes, you see there are formalities. Things have to be signed and the lawyers have to come. It’s rather difficult”—he smiled at me deprecatingly—“in the circumstances.”
    I decided to speak out boldly. I said: “You mean because of Jessie.”
    “Yes,” he said. “Because of Jessie.” He lifted a hand. “I know what you are going to say. Get rid of Jessie.”
    I nodded.
    “This is something you won’t understand. You have lived a conventional life, you had good parents, and now a good husband. We are not all so fortunate as you. Our lives don’t run along such pleasant tracks. We ourselves are not always very pleasant people.”
    I said: “You are telling me that Jessie occupies a rather special position in this household and because of that it is not easy to get rid of her.”
    “Well, she would have to go if I told her to. That could be arranged.”
    “And you want me to get your lawyers to do that.”
    “No. Oh dear me, no. I don’t want to be rid of Jessie. I don’t know what I’d do without her. … It is just for the will.”
    “And yet …”
    “I told you it would be difficult for you to understand, didn’t I? I am very fond of ladies. I always have been … from the age of about fourteen. I could not imagine my life without them. There were always ladies. I led a wild life. I had had a dozen mistresses by the time I was twenty. I am sorry. I am shocking you but you must understand. I don’t want to upset Jessie. She means a great deal to me. My … comforts depend on her. But I don’t want trouble and she can’t have Eversleigh, can she? Can you imagine all those irate ancestors of our rising up against me? I’d be struck down before I could put pen to paper. Well, there is family pride in me too. No … Eversleigh for the Eversleighs. The long line must not be broken.”
    “I think I begin to understand, Uncle Carl.”
    “That is good. You may have heard about Felicity, my wife. … I was forty when we met. I loved her dearly. She was twenty-two. Five years we were together. I was different then … the model husband … never wanted to stray from my own fireside. Then we were going to have a child. That seemed perfection. She died and the child with her. That was the lowest point of despair I have ever known.”
    “I’m sorry, uncle. I had heard of that.”
    “A common tragedy perhaps. Well, what did I do? I pulled myself out of my misery and went back to what I had been before Felicity came into my life. Women …. They had to be there, I couldn’t do without them. There were always women. My namesake, that other uncle Carl of yours, the general, didn’t approve of me at all. I should have been managing the estate after Leigh died and he had to do it because I wouldn’t leave my life in London. He was an army man. … He hadn’t the same feel for the place that had gone into it. And then when he died I changed again. I saw my duty. And suddenly I thought I’d come into my own … so I came back. I got quite fond of the place. You do, you know. All those ancestors hanging around in frames … they become part of you. I began to take a pride in old Eversleigh … and see