The awful consequences of the events were boring into me harder and harder.
Utanc would never talk to me again. She would never dance for me. She would never even look at me. I felt she was cut off from me forever.
I couldn't live with that.
I tried futilely to dredge up anything I knew in psychology that would handle any part of this. There was nothing. The grief became heavier and heavier.
All the rest of that day I sat there in the gloom. I sat there all through the night.
The next morning, base commander Faht Bey entered the yard. He was going to go into the patio but Karagoz came over and pointed to where I was sitting under the shrubs.
Faht Bey came over. "Sultan Bey," he said, "please do not murder that new girl you got. We have enough trouble without more corpses to explain away."
Dully, I said, "I didn't try to kill her."
"Well, the staff here thinks you did. And Karagoz told me that the girl is terrified for her life."
"Terrified for her life?" I said. It was so far from the way I felt, it just didn't sink in right away.
Faht Bey nodded. "Karagoz says she was already afraid she'd be attacked here. And actually, in my opinion, we ourselves are not well defended at all. We don't even have alarm systems to alert us in event of a major attack."
He looked at me for a while. Then he said, "Will you please promise me not to kill that girl and leave her body lying about? If you want to be rid of her, why, just send her away."
It was his parting shot. He left. But he might as well have used an 800-kilovolt blastick.
The thought of Utanc going away made my blood freeze in my veins!
That was the thought I had been trying not to think! That she would leave!
Oh, it was one thing not to be talked to, to be shunned. But it was quite another for her not to be around at all! I could not tolerate the idea of it!
My wits were churning.
Somehow I got the thought to come straight.
She felt undefended.
Perhaps if she felt defended, she would not get the idea of leaving!
Driven by this, I rushed to my office. I got out pen and paper.
I began to design a defense alarm system.
The more I worked at it, the more carried away I became. I would make it really good!
I started with the gate. One of the numbers outside it could be pushed. That would call the whole staff to defend the gate!
I put an alarm buzzer in her room so she would be able to press it and alert the staff if she was afraid.
And then I got to thinking about what Faht had said about the base being not well defended. So I designed an alarm-signal system for it that would assemble all the base personnel into the hangar; they would have gun emplacements in the center and be able to shoot at every entrance.
I put the signal buzzer for it in my secret office. By treading on just one tile and twisting one's foot, one could assemble the entire base to man the hangar and be ready to shoot.
I finished it up. I marked it top priority. I wrote an order that the staff would be drilled and another order that the whole base personnel would be drilled.
She would hear that the place was now defended.
It was all I could think of to do.
The heavy feeling of loss came over me again.
I knew I had been parted from Utanc and I thought it was forever.
I was crushed.
PART TWENTY-ONE
Chapter 1
More to take my mind off my troubles than as a matter of concern, that afternoon I slouched into my secret office and turned on the viewer. After all, Raht and Terb were on the job and we would soon have the platen and could end Heller.
Frankly, I was too far gone to pay much attention. But after a bit I came up to strong interest in what was going on.
Bang-Bang was taking Heller down in the Gracious Palms elevator. Heller, I could see in the elevator mirror, was dressed in a white, V-neck sweater over a sea-green silk shirt. He was wearing slacks to match the shirt. His red baseball cap was on the back of his blond head. I wondered dully how Heller always managed to look so neat