daisy Allie had given her into her poetry notebook.
After dinner, her creative writing classmate, Serena, had come over so they could read their latest poems and give each other feedback. When Serena returned home, Kimiko felt inspired by her encouragement to keep working on her poem. For the rest of the evening, she typed and retyped words, shifted stanzas, moved sentences . . . .
One minute she loved what she’d written. The next moment she hated it. Writing was always like that for her. The words never lived up to the feelings she wanted to express. From the very first word she put on paper, it seemed as though the poem was already ruined.
Tonight was no different. Her eyes were blurry from fatigue as she read over what she’d written:
T HE W ORLD ’S S IX T RILLIONTH L OVE P OEM
P OEMS ABOUT LOVE AREN’T REALLY;
THEY’RE ABOUT WANTING THE WRONG
PERSON, THE ONE WHO
DOESN’T LOVE YOU BACK. THEY’RE ABOUT
LUST, JEALOUSY, ENVY, LOSS. ABOUT
FALSE PROMISES, SHATTERED DREAMS,
BROKEN HEARTS. ABOUT
TEARS, LAUGHTER, REJECTION, DEATH,
EVERYTHING EXCEPT
LOVE.
POEM UPON POEM, SONNET
AFTER SONNET. ALL WITH THE SAME
REFRAIN :
“H AVE H OPE ! Y OU MUST ! K EEP LOVE
ALIVE !”
S O WE KEEP READING THEM, WRITING THEM, AND THINKING:
MAYBE THIS ONE
WILL BE DIFFERENT.
Kimiko let out a breath, still dissatisfied. Despite Serena’s encouragement, she still wasn’t happy with it. But she didn’t know what else to change. She knew from experience that she could work on it till dawn and she still wouldn’t be content. Might as well just give up and hit DELETE
“That means it’s time to put it aside,” Ms. Swann, her creative writing teacher always told the class.
Exhausted, Kimiko hit SAVE and closed the file. She was changing into her pajamas when her cell rang.
“He’s a virgin,” Sergio announced as soon as she answered. “He’s never even French-kissed—until tonight.”
“Wow,” Kimiko said, taking off her cap and sliding into bed. “He must really like you.”
“Huh?” Sergio asked, stopping at a traffic light.
“If you’re the first person he’s ever Frenched,” Kimiko explained, “he must think you’re really special.”
“Well, that’s pressure!” Sergio said, gripping the steering wheel more tightly. “What if I don’t live up to what he’s expecting?”
“Well, you can’t control what he expects. All you can do is be yourself.”
“Yes, Oprah,” Sergio said, continuing down the road. “At least we hashed out the bi thing. I think he finally got it. I feel like his teacher, which I kind of like. And I told him about Zelda and about hooking up. Man, I was a blabbermouth.”
“It’s good you put it all out there.”
“Yeah. I’m amazed he didn’t freak out.”
“That’s a good sign.”
“It’s hard to believe he’s a virgin. Damn, he’s a great kisser. Frickin’ gifted! How is it nobody’s snatched him up?”
“So does that mean there will be a second date?” Kimiko asked, just as her cell phone beeped. “Hold on! I got a text.”
“Let me guess,” Sergio said as she came back on. “Is it from your date this afternoon?”
“Shush, dude!”
“So what does she say?”
“That she liked the Girl Panic manga I gave her.”
Sergio burst into a laugh. “You gave her a girl-girl love story?”
“Well, she’d never read one before. I was just being friendly.”
“And she liked it, huh? She is so bi.”
“She’s just being polite. Let me text her back.” She wrote to Allie: Glad u liked it. Hope 2 c u again soon!
She continued to talk with Sergio until he arrived home. When he got to his room, he went online to check messages and found an IM from Lance: Thanx 4 a great time.
Should I reply? Sergio wondered; although he’d enjoyed the time with Lance, this was starting to feel a little too gooey.
Ditto, he wrote back. Then he undressed and climbed between the sheets, eager