Free Red is for Remembrance by Laurie Faria Stolarz

my question across it: WHAT DO I NEED TO DO TO GET
    ON WITH MY LIFE? I fold the paper up and place it into the bowl, hoping that my dream tonight will bring me the answer.
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Shell
    Shell wakes up with a gasp and sits up in bed, his heart pounding hard. Brick and the others are still asleep. He looks at the clock-- 5 AM; he still has another hour before he has to get up. But how is he supposed to fall back asleep when he can't stop shaking?
    He grabs a pen and a piece of paper from the space on the floor beside his bed and writes the words "To Candace, forever, with love," just as it was inscribed in the pocket 85
     
    watch at the old couple's place. He looks down at the words, wondering why he dreamt about them, why they plague him so. He could hear the words chanting in his head, getting louder and louder by the moment, until he couldn't take it anymore and forced himself to wake up.
    Does he know Candace somehow-- from some place he's not remembering?
    He shakes his head, frustrated by his lack of memory but, at the same time, grateful for it. Aside from his life at the camp during the past few months, he has no recollection of anything. Mason said it's because his past was so horrific that his brain is trying to protect him by blocking out the events, vaguely mentioning a life on the streets, complete with a near-fatal illness, some time spent in jail, and constant begging for food and money. Mason's also assured him that it's better he can't remember these things, that such horrific details might stunt his brain even more.
    But now he wants to know.
    He grabs another piece of paper and writes a question mark across it, wondering about his mind, if one day it might deteriorate completely. He folds the two pieces up and slips them under his pillow, beside the rock with the pentacle on it, silently praying for recollection.
    Less than an hour later, Shell wakes up-- this time, energized by his dream.
    He dreamt about Lily
    It felt good to see her so happy last night, to feel her body close to his, and to touch her like that.
    It almost made
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    the whole idea of what they were doing-- according to Clay, Mason, and the rest, not stealing from others, but providing well-off people the opportunity to give when they probably otherwise wouldn't-- less harsh .. . more acceptable.
    Almost.
    The glint in Lily's eyes when she wrapped the mink stole around her and set the hat high atop her head made his heart stir. She'll wonders if the owners truly appreciate such items as much as Lily did. He closes his eyes, remembering their kiss, his lips tingling from the mere thought of it.
    "Breakfast is early this morning," Brick mumbles groggily pulling himself out of bed. "We should probably hurry up."
    Brick's bed is directly across from Shell's. It's a pretty large room, large enough to fit six beds, two dressers, and one closet. There's also some storage space in an adjoining room but, since campers in general don't have need for the excessive materials of man, the extra space isn't really used.
    Shell and Brick share the cabin with three other boys: Teal, Oak, and Horizon. The three of them, all a few years younger than Brick, around thirteen years old, are pretty much inseparable.
     
    She'll imagines he must be at least four or five years older than the boys, around seventeen or eighteen, from what he can tell of his reflection. When they found him on the streets, he didn't have an ID, and age seems less and less important at the camp.
    Shell nods to Brick in acknowledgement. He knows he should probably get going. Today is trading day and Mason likes to leave right on time. While Brick grabs some fresh clothes and toiletries and heads out to the bathroom to
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    shower, and Teal, Oak, and Horizon remain in bed, relishing the last few minutes of sleep, She'll grabs the folded pieces of paper from under his pillow, his head fuzzing over with questions'. He knows that he did a spell last night, but he has no idea why. How does he