Free Discovering Us by Harper Bentley

So if I went ahead and went to a party with Rebecca and Ross tonight, would you trust me?”
    I could hear him take a deep breath then let it out. “El, it’s not that I don’t trust you . It’s all those horny bastards who’d be checking you out that I don’t trust.”
    “Oh, so you can go out, but I should stay home and just learn to deal with all the horny bitches wanting a piece of you then, right? That’s what you’re saying?”
    “I don’t wanna fight, El.”
    “Who’s fighting, Jag?” My voice level had increased and my blood pressure was spiking, I was sure, but who was fighting?
    “Well, this isn’t exactly not fighting,” he said with a chuckle.
    “I’m sorry. It just pisses me off sometimes, hell all the time, that we’re apart. And it doesn’t help seeing Rebecca and Ross together day in and day out. It’s just not fair.”
    “I know, babe, but there’s nothing we can do about it right now. I’m sorry.”
    It was my turn to take a deep breath and release it. “I know. I’m sorry too.”
    We sat there being silent together.
    “El?”
    “Yeah?”
    “If it helps, I love you. Forever and a day.”
    And leave it to him to turn things around. “I love you too, Jag. Always,” I whispered.
    We hung up having made it over that little snag. But I’d made up my mind that I was going to start living my life more, stop waiting around, and have fun. Because Rebecca had told me I wasn’t. And because Jag just told me I should. I went to my bathroom and dug through my makeup.
    “Okay, going for dramatic tonight,” I declared. After making my eyes smoky, I poufed my hair big. Not bad. I was ecstatic to see that I wasn’t totally helpless in the looking like a girl department.
    I headed to my bedroom and looked through my closet, finding some nice jeans and a cute little navy, peplum blouse with a back zip to wear, pairing that with Rebecca’s five-inch sparkly navy heels and I was good to go.
     

Chapter 9
    I was still nineteen when I when I got a taste of the party life on my own.
                  I arrived at Slade’s party looking pretty good, if I did say so myself. It was nice to dress up for a change in the evening instead of resorting to baggy sweatpants and an old t-shirt while I waited around for Jag to call. When Rebecca saw me, she all but pounced on me.
    “El! Oh my God! I’m so glad you’re here!” she squealed hugging me.
    My teeth clacked in my head as she jumped up and down clinging to me. “Um, how about you calm down now?” I said with a snort putting my hands on her shoulders to keep her still.
    “But we haven’t gone out together in forever! I’m just so happy to see you here!” she said beaming at me.
    If that’s all it took to make my bestie happy, then I was good with it. I put a finger on the rim of her cup tilting it down to peek inside it. “What’s your poison?”
    “Rocket Fuel.”
    “Bec.” I raised an eyebrow at her.
    “El.” She snickered, giving me the same look.
    The last time she’d gone to a party at Slade’s, she’d come home with Ross so drunk she could hardly walk. Apparently, this Rocket Fuel was a concoction that was made up of beer, lemonade and vodka with a bit of Everclear thrown in for good measure that was meant to knock you on your ass, which she’d proven loud and clear. Loud because listening to her that night puking in the bathroom had been awesome (not), and clear because the whole next day she’d looked like hammered shit.
    “I’ll pass.”
    “No! You have to try it!”
    I narrowed my eyes at her as she shoved her cup in my face. But when I took a sip, it actually was pretty good. I raised my eyebrows and puckered out my lips making my assessment. “Not bad.”
    “Told you! Let’s go get you a cup.”
    We wended our way through the gobs of people to the screen-enclosed back porch where there was, swear to God, what looked like a freaking horse tank full of the drink. I slowly turned my head and looked