Free Every Heart by LK Collins Page A

sleep?”
    I can’t help but laugh. “I didn’t.”
    “Damn, I’m sorry, girl. Did you talk to Bain?”
    “Yeah. Finally, this morning he called.”
    “And?”
    “He’s not good, at all.”
    “I can imagine. I hate to say it, but you really need to make a decision. I mean, what’s the point of waiting any longer?”
    “I know I need to, but saying it and doing it are two totally different things.”
    “I know. Let’s talk about things.”
    “I really don’t think I want to right now,” I tell her being completely honest. I’m tired from not sleeping and am not sure my brain can function enough to make such a life affecting decision.
    “Well, tough shit, you need to. You’re the one that has to make this decision, no one else. You can’t leave these two hanging like you have. Especially if Bain isn’t doing well.”
    I tilt my head back and stare at the ceiling, thinking of her question. My heart aches for both Nate and Bain, and I know as much as I keep making excuses for not deciding, I need to. Being in Nate’s arms was so comforting, it was everything I used to have with him. From the way he held me, to how he looked in my eyes.
    But then there is Bain and the fire he puts inside of me is something on an entire different level. I melt at the pure sight of him and that’s not to mention what his touch does to me.
    “So what does your gut tell you right off the bat?” she asks me.
    “I love them both, I really do. But I love them in different ways. I waited for Nate for almost a year and during that time I ached for him. Every ounce of who I was needed him. He never came back to me. Then Bain emerged into my life and I fought my feelings for him with all of my might. But everything about Bain is powerful, and I failed, succumbing to him and everything that he is.”
    “I don’t think you can ever love two people the same. Even parents, they love their children differently. I mean, look at me and my sister, for instance. Polar opposites.”
    “The problem is, I do love them both.”
    “Who do you see your future with?”
    “I had everything planned out with Nate. He asked me to marry him, we talked about kids and how we wanted to grow old together. With Bain, I don’t know what he wants. We haven’t talked about those sort of things.”
    “Arion, does any of that really matter, or is this about taking each day as they come and being happy while you do it? What’s meant to be will be. I mean, who cares what you’ve talked about, because God can rip it all away at any moment and there is nothing you can do.”
    “You’re right. This is about whom I wholeheartedly love. Regardless of the past, or the future. I think I know what I need to do.”
    “Good, you know I support you regardless of your decision.”
    “I know. Would you mind if I had Nate come over here? So we could have some privacy? I’m sure his mom is home and I want to talk to him without anyone lurking.”
    “Of course you can. I’m actually headed to the gym.”
    Aubrey walks off and I dial Nate’s house number. It rings a few times, then he answers. “Hey, how are you?” I ask him.
    “I’m better now. Is this for real, are you really calling here?”
    “Oh stop it, Nate. Listen, I need to see you, can you come over to Aubrey’s?”
    “Of course I can. Is everything okay?”
    “Yeah, it is.”
    We hang up and I give Aubrey a hug on her way out. She asks what my decision is. I knew it would be too long for her to wait without knowing who I’ve chosen. She looks at me with genuine happiness in her eyes and says, “Stay strong, A.”
    “I will.”
    I know it won’t take Nate long to get here, so I do the best that I can and pull myself together. Then as I finish brushing my teeth, I hear a knock on the door. Right away, my stomach goes into my throat.
    I head towards it and as I stare at the white paint, I exhale and pray what I am doing is right. Nate knocks again, clearly impatient. I open it and look into his