Free Murderous Muffins by Lois Lavrisa

reached for the machine and hit a button. “If you don’t mind, we’re going to record this. And we may use your answers as evidence, and to ensure that we can use your statement in court, we would like to read you your rights.”
    Officer Ray said, “Normally we only read them if you are under arrest, but it’s good practice for our new recruit, too. Okay?”
    “Fine.” Did I have a choice? I thought not.
    After they read me my rights, I asked, “Do I need an attorney?”
    Officer Ray shut off the recorder. “I don’t know. Do you need one?”
    “No. I have nothing to hide,” I said.
    “Okay, then let’s get going on questions.” Officer Ray pushed a button on the recorder. “So what you are saying is that you are waiving your rights?”
    I nodded my head.
    “Excuse me, Miss Gordon, you need to verbalize your answer. The recording machine does not pick up body language,” Officer Ray said. “Once again, do you waive your rights to an attorney?”
    “Uh, yes, sir. I guess so,” I said.
    “I know this must be really stressful for you,” Officer Tracy added.
    They had no idea. I slumped a little. “Yes.”
    “So, we’ve talked to everyone in your house. And let me tell you, this is not looking good for you.” Ray flipped through a pile of papers. “First off, you are running a boardinghouse. Which is fine if approved with permits and such.”
    Officer Tracy nodded.
    Ray smirked. “And just for grins, I looked through records and found that you have no license or permit for taking in paying boarders.”
    “Now that is an issue.” Tracy glanced at me.
    “Correct. And illegal.” Ray squinted. “Oh, but it doesn’t stop there. I dug a little more and found out that you have a load of unpaid taxes.”
    Hattie had always told me that the truth was a lot cheaper than a lie. Too bad the truth couldn’t pay my bills. “Yes, sir.”
    “So where do we begin here?” Ray pulled a sheet of paper and looked down at it. “Let’s start with Miss Lily Danny. She said that you said, and I quote, ‘I promise I will do whatever it takes to make Mr. Phong be quiet.’ Did you say that?”
    “Yes. I mean, I did say something like that, but I—” The words seemed to catch in my throat.
    “Tracy, you do have the recorder on?” Ray asked. “Ms. Gordon just verified what Miss Lily Danny said.”
    Tracy pulled the machine toward him. “Yes, sir.”
    I raised my arm in the air as though I were in school. “Please let me explain. I never meant that I would kill him to make him quiet, if that’s what you’re implying.”
    “We weren’t,” Ray said.
    Tracy put a hand up. “Not me.”
    Ray smirked. “But if someone was dead, they sure would be quiet.”
    “That’s for certain.” Tracy nodded.
    I gasped. “I beg your pardon, but really? Y’all are twisting my words around with your fancy mumbo jumbo questioning. It’s making me sound guilty before being proven innocent. Isn’t it supposed to be the other way around?”
    “Innocent until proven guilty—it’s called the presumption of innocence,” Tracy said.
    Officer Ray sucked in a breath. “Thanks for the lesson, Tracy. I know you just graduated top of your academy class, but we’re not in school here. Anyway, Miss Gordon, let’s move on. Your other tenant, Mrs. Catherine Alice Thomson, said—”
    I leaned in. “Pardon me. Cat is not a tenant of mine. She is a dear friend who is just staying for a few days.”
    Tracy asked, “She’s not paying rent?”
    “No, sir.” She did bring in a couple of bags of groceries, but I feared to even mention that in case it was somehow used against me.
    “Well, isn’t that a first?” Ray chortled. “She’s the only one staying there legally. Like a real guest rather than a lodger.”
    I let out a nervous giggle. Cat had offered to get an attorney for me. I’d refused her, since I had nothing to hide. Plus, I didn’t have a dime to spare, and most important, I was not guilty.
    “To continue,