Free Loving Mr. Daniels by Brittainy C. Cherry

slipped my hands into my pockets and stared up at the night sky. It all seemed so simple. A bar with music that touched my soul. A boy who knew what it was like to lose a part of his joy. A light breeze that refreshed my entire being. “If there were a God, which I’m not certain that there is, do you think this night would be a form of apology for him taking away the things we loved?”
    He released a breath and rubbed his hand across his mouth. “I don’t know. But I think it’s a good start.”
    We were silent again. I’d never known that a silence could feel so much like home. He couldn’t stop smiling, yet neither could I. They were intense, cheesy grins that felt nothing but natural.
    He broke the stillness and stepped backwards. “Well this has been a really fucking weird night.”
    “I can second that.”
    “All right then. I will stop bothering you and let you get going.”
    “Yeah, of course. It’s just…” My words faded off, and he looked at me with narrowed eyes, waiting for me to finish. “I’m not ready to go yet. Because I know once I leave, all of this will be over. All of the magic of tonight that turned off my mind for a few hours will be gone and I’ll be sad Ashlyn again.”
    “Are you asking me to make believe with you for a little while longer?” he asked.
    I nodded with hopeful eyes, praying he wouldn’t think I was a total nut job.
    He lifted my hand into his and nudged me in my shoulder. “Let’s take a walk,” he offered.

    We took lap after lap around the block. I didn’t know why, but we started exchanging stories back and forth about our lives. On lap three, Daniel told me about his father, how they hadn’t been close until his mom died. Then they’d grown really close, and he regretted the years he’d lost due to being distant. He paused on the corner of Humboldt Street and James Avenue and took a deep inhale. Staring out into the night, he laced his fingers behind his neck and closed his eyes. I didn’t say anything because the regret in his body language was saying all that needed to be said.
    I learned that he had a brother, but when I asked about him, Daniel’s body tensed up. “We don’t talk.” The words came out colder than anything I’d heard him say before. I didn’t ask more about it.
    On lap four, we laughed about how overly tired we both were and how we hadn’t been able to truly sleep. On lap six, I cried. It started out with a few fallen tears but morphed into full-on waterworks, and Daniel didn’t ask me to explain. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his chest, soothing tones leaving his lips.
    I tried to choke out the words to tell him that I would be all right, but he warned me against them. He said that it was okay to not be okay. He explained that it was fine to be broken for a while, to not feel anything but hurt. We stayed on lap six the longest, him whispering against my hair that someday, somehow, the hurt would be overshadowed by the joy.
    Later, I told him about the bucket list Gabby had crafted for me, and he asked to read it. Reaching into my purse, I pulled out the folded piece of paper and handed it to him. He held it with such care, unfolding it slowly. I watched his eyes travel from left to right as he moved his way down the list.
    “Hula-hoop in a department store?” he questioned, arching an eyebrow my way.
    I chuckled, nodding.
    “Sing a Michael Jackson song at a karaoke bar, including dance moves?”
    “I know, right? That one was more Gabby than it was me,” I replied.
    He smiled at the list before folding it back up and handing it to me.  He asked me how many I have checked off so far, making me sigh.
    “None yet. I was supposed to dance on the bar tonight…but as you witnessed, I had a minor mental breakdown.”
    “So you haven’t read a letter from your sister yet?”
    “Not yet. I kind of want to just rip them all open but…”
    He laughed as he started to walk around the block again. “But you