Free Every Shattered Thing (Come Alive) by Elora Ramirez

recover, at least physically. Now? I don’t get the privilege of resting. Sometimes I’m even called out in the middle of the day during school. No one has said anything. I don’t even think I’ve been held accountable for my truancy. Makes me wonder just how far my dad’s indiscretions reach. And now...Kevin’s involved. He knows. My heart constricts and I fight the fear from bubbling up and taking over.
    If dad finds out...
    Kevin squeezes my hand, bringing me out of the flood of pain and memory. He makes short tutting noises with his tongue as we walk.
    “This isn’t okay, Steph. It’s just not...”
    I interrupt him, bringing one of my hands up to motion the conversation over. “Kevin. Just don’t.”
    We continue for awhile—both lost in our thoughts and all our questions about the future. Once again, he’s the first to break the silence.
    “Does Emma know about this?” he questions, shock still radiating from his eyes. I stay quiet for awhile, trying to figure out how to answer.
    “Not directly,” I say. “”She knows my dad has the authorities wrapped, but she doesn’t know how or why he’s managed to get away with so much.”
    Kevin places his hands in his pockets and then pulls them out—blowing on the insides to warm them up and protect them from the biting cold. “Have you ever thought about telling her? What if she and Jude knew? Don’t you think...”
    “I can’t.” My words are firm. A warning. “And neither can you.”
    I purposefully walk a little faster so Kevin gets the hint to stop pushing the issue. I’m a little bit ahead of him and my stomach starts to growl in protest of not getting anything since upchucking after seeing Valerie and my dad. I think about the gooey goodness of Cloud Nine’s cinnamon rolls and the impending doom surrounding my Physics test. You know, things normal teenagers would think about —
    not being traded for sex or knowing their dad is fucking one of their friends. The mood swing is drastic; I’m well aware. But, there’s nothing I can do to stop it when it comes. It’s pretty simple, really. I feel one way, and I don’t like it, so I feel something else. Right now? I feel hunger. Hunger, and worry about school.
    I need normalcy and I need to not think about the fact that I just gave my boyfriend every reason to run as far away from me as possible.
    “Hey Steph—wait up.”
    Kevin’s footsteps strike a quick cadence against the sidewalk as he works to catch up with me. He grabs my hand and pulls me back in step with him. Glancing at me out of the corner of his eye he stumbles through his words.
    “Don't be mad at me, Stephanie. It’s just...this is fucked up. And I’m not buying it’s because we live in different worlds and there are different rules so I don’t really know how to respond.” He grabs my face with his hands and I notice there are tears threatening the corners of his eyes. “You need to hear me.
    Okay? Hear me. This is fucked up. It’s not okay. And I need time to figure this out and I need to know how the hell I’m ever going to look at your dad without beating the shit out of him. It’s absolutely maddening to know someone you care about needs protecting and you can do nothing to protect them.”
    We stare at each other in silence, frozen in our spots on the sidewalk. I can see the Cloud Nine sign blinking neon in the distance, and just past that on the horizon, a blinding shade of orange bursting into red catches my attention.
    “The sky is screaming.” My voice cracks against the quiet and startles Kevin out of his thoughts.
    He looks at the sky and then back at me.
    “What?” he asks.
    I point at the sunrise. “Look at the sky. It’s screaming. The colors are begging us to notice. The reds dancing and making a soft shade of pink on the clouds’ underbellies and the blue fighting for its own place in the sky.” I look at him and shrug my shoulders, “The sky screams for people to notice —even when we know