cut-grass scent comforted me and I tried to remind myself that it was the safety of a trusted friend that was warming my heart; that the slow, delicious churning in my stomach had nothing to do with the way his body molded so perfectly against my curves. I stiffened immediately when I felt the hard coldness of Nina pressing up against me, her arms splayed in group-hug format, her head resting on my shoulder. âThis moment is just so beautiful,â she murmured.
I broke away from our threesome and stared at Nina.
âYou know, I think I am going to take this warm, fuzzy feeling outside.â She grabbed her purse and disappeared out the door, leaving Alex and I alone together in the silent apartment. We were still in a loose hug. I flushed and Alex straightened, then smiled. He pulled me close.
âThis feels good,â he murmured.
I wanted to resist, but his arms around me were like warm chocolate. âIt does,â I said finally.
âLook, Lawson, Iââ Alex looked down at me and his cobalt eyes were deep, and soft. He licked his lips. âI just couldnât take it if anything ever happened to you.â
I smiled. âI think Iâve proven Iâm pretty resilient.â
Alexâs lips pushed up into his trademark half-smile and my stomach fluttered. He brushed my bangs from my forehead. âThat, you have.â Alex leaned close to me, his soft curls lolling over his forehead. I drank in his warm scent and rolled up on my toes as his arms tightened around my waist, his lips brushed against mine, and then he was kissing me.
My head spun in delicious chaos as Alexâs palms caressed my back and he kissed and nibbled my lips, my ears, my neck. My heart thumped and I started to lose my breath and Alex broke away, raking a hand through his hair. His curls resettled in that perfectly tousled way.
âI should go,â he said quickly.
I looked at him, deflated, rejected. âOh. Okay.â
He took my hand, squeezed it softly. His eyes were warm, sad. âIâm sorry, I justâI need to go.â
I hugged my arms to my chest, forced a smile. âHey, no problem. Thanks for the information. I should go to bed now anyway.â
âThatâs a good idea. We can take this up tomorrow.â Alex strode to the dining room table, began unzipping his backpack and stacking the books to go inside.
âAlex,â I started, once his back was to me. âWhatâs it like?â
He turned slowly. âWhatâs what like?â
I studied the carpet. âHeaven.â
The slow smile of memory spread across his lips, but his eyes were far away. âI canât describe it.â
I sat down at the table and Alex followed suit. âWhy?â I asked. âAre you not allowed or something?â
Alex slowly wagged his head from side to side and then looked at me. âThere are no words.â
âDo you miss it?â I asked, my voice sounding small. âSo you miss Heaven?â
Alex slid the leftover Chinese food boxes closer to him and plucked out a fortune cookie. He broke it, popped a piece in his mouth, and chewed thoughtfully. âOf course. Itâs home. Itâs all Iâve known forââhe shrugged, swallowedââforever.â
âOh.â I picked at a glob of solid grease on the dining-room table. âIs there anything you like about being here?â
One corner of Alexâs mouth turned up into a wry grin. âI like you.â
I blushed, went back to studying my table. âThanks.â
âAnd the food.â Alex pushed the last bit of fortune cookie into his mouth. âI absolutely love the food. We didnât have Chinese takeout like this when I was there last.â
I crumpled up a napkin and threw it across the table at him. He started sliding the books into his pack again until I put my hand flat on the table, pinning a single volume under my palm. âIâm keeping