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and feel as if every muscle in my body is complaining at once. June copies me and even adds a groan for good measure. Together, we move the boulder blocking our cave and head to the river to wash.
As we dab ourselves with water, I inform June of a decision I’ve made.
“So June, I am going out again today, past the perimeter. I need you to do something while I’m gone.”
“What do you need me to do?”
“I need you to hunt on your own today.”
June freezes where she wades and looks at me, her eyes round with surprise. “Really? You want me to hunt by myself?” she asks. “I thought you said it is too dangerous when you are not close by, that I am not ready,”
“Well, maybe you should stay put and hang around the cave,” I toy with her.
“No!” she exclaims quickly. “Uh-uh! There’s no way you’re making me stay inside the cave by myself!”
“Oh, so you do want to hunt on your own?” I ask as if I don’t already know the answer to my question.
“Of course I want to, and don’t you dare think about changing your mind, Avery!”
“Okay, fine,” I say as if she’s somehow convinced me. “You win. You can hunt. But you need to be careful. Be aware of your surroundings.”
“ Yes!” She claps her hands and bounces up and down.
“Calm down there, Miss Springy,” I tell her teasingly. “I am not sending you out there so you can bounce and play. You have to try to kill something for dinner, and you have to stay close to the cave.”
I meant to sound playful, but June stops bouncing and frowns. She straightens her posture.
“I know I am not going today so I can play,” she says quietly. “I am going so I can help. I am going to hunt for us near the cave while you hunt farther out in the woods.”
Her cheeks are pink. I have embarrassed her.
“June, there’s nothing wrong with playing and bouncing around. I love that about you,” I tell her. “I was trying to joke around with you. I guess I didn’t do a very good job of it because you are hurt.” I reach out and place a hand on her shoulder. “I never want to hurt your feelings.”
I am surprised when she shrugs off my hand. “I’m fine,” she says. “You don’t have to keep treating me like a baby ‘cause I’m not a baby anymore. I’m eight, remember?”
She is eight. How could I forget? I was just a little older than she is when I held her minutes after she was born. I remember twirling and bouncing when I first met her. I remember what the magic of littleness feels like. I do not want her to lose it. I do not want her to feel pressure to grow up faster than she has to. I am the adult, not her. I am here so she can enjoy as much of her youth as possible while learning to survive in the hostile world we live in.
On a whim, I decide to do something I have not done in a long time. I bounce and splash, scooping handfuls of water and slapping my palms up before the water returns to the river. When my hands collide with the water and smack it, droplets spray in every direction.
June watches me from the c orner of her eye.
I use both hands to ladle a generous amount then toss it up and whack it as hard as I can. Water cascades over June’s h air. She whips her head around and looks at me, rolling her eyes. She is being stubborn.
I ignore her stubbornness and continue to caper about, splashing and jumping and laughing. At first, I fake my enthusiasm for June’s benefit. But after a few minutes, my silliness becomes genuine.
Before long, I am not alone in my frolicking. June joins in. She is splashing, stomping , and flopping in the water, splattering me with as much as she possibly can. My hair is dripping and my clothes are soaked, and I laugh so hard my belly hurts. June is laughing too. She laughs so hard her eyes tear. I guess she needs to see me let loose once in a while.
“Ah, Avery,” she gasps , but