Free Danger Close by Kaylea Cross Page B

sustained. She felt sick knowing that Wade had been there and hadn’t stopped it. She swallowed, suddenly not feeling so safe with him anymore.
    Wade traced a line in the wooden table with one long finger, avoiding her gaze. “The CIA was waiting for the final bits of intel on other major players involved with Rahim’s network before I could call in a team to bring him down. I was nearing the critical point in the last op when the attack on the Sec Def happened. One of Rahim’s underlings had organized it. And when I saw him in that cell, I knew it was all over.”
    Erin waited for him to continue, for him to say something that would reassure her he was the decent man she’d thought him to be and not some cold-hearted bastard who put his reputation before American lives. Her hands curled into fists against her ribcage.
    “I couldn’t interfere right away without blowing my cover. The prisoners were all in pretty bad shape, Maya and the Sec Def especially. Because of the severity of the Sec Def’s condition, I already knew my mission and cover were compromised. I contacted my handler. When the cell leader forced them into a game of Russian roulette, I took all the bullets out of the revolver when he wasn’t looking then set up a diversion.”
    Russian roulette? As in, forced them to put a gun to their heads and pull the trigger to find out if the chamber was loaded or not? Erin unwrapped her arms from around herself and put her hands over her mouth, horrified by what he was saying, by what Maya and the others had endured.
    “Once I did that there was no going back, so I did what I had to do and helped them escape back to friendly lines.”
    She swallowed again, the surge of relief so strong it made her feel queasy. He’d been the one to get them out. He’d saved them. But the sick feeling that remained in her gut was because she understood exactly what he wasn’t saying. “So you mean if not for the Sec Def, you would have…”
    Left them all there .
    The words echoed between them in the sudden stillness.
    To his credit, Wade didn’t squirm or try to deny the silent accusation. Instead he nodded once, his jaw flexing beneath the dark covering of whiskers as he met her stare unflinchingly. “Yeah,” he said in a low voice.

Chapter Seven
    In the silence that followed his admission, Wade waited for Erin to react. He was ready for her to leap up and run from the room, prepared at least for her eyes to turn cold and a look of horror and loathing to steal over her face. But none of those things happened.
    She merely sat there staring at him, weighing him for the longest moment, then nodded once. “Okay, I get why you did it.”
    Of all the things she could’ve said, that was the last thing he’d ever expected to hear coming out of her mouth.
    She rubbed her palms over the thighs of her jeans, glanced down at her hands. “That must have been hard on you. Living that way for so long, I mean.” She shook her head as if she had trouble imagining it.
    Wade wasn’t sure what to say to that, but he knew some sort of response was required so he cleared his throat and tried to think of something to say. “It was my job. And it wasn’t all bad. There are things about living in Afghanistan that I loved. Aspects of the culture like the hospitality, living a simpler life than we do here, unplugging from everything. Many of the teachings in Islam. But mostly it was the villagers I got to know. They were good, hardworking people.” He’d probably always miss those things, the friends he’d made there.
    Erin raised her head, searched his eyes. She wasn’t looking at him like he was a monster. No, she was looking at him as though she understood why he’d made the choices he had, though that was impossible, because who the hell could understand him and what he’d done? “I’m really glad you got them out, though,” she added in a quiet voice. “No matter why.”
    Something eased in his chest. A pressure he hadn’t