Free Poisoned Honey: A Story of Mary Magdalene by Beatrice Gormley

I hoped it would take him at least forty days to arrange a betrothal.
    I wasn’t sure how to go about seeking a sign from heaven, but I had the impression that praying and fasting might help me recognize it. So I kept a regular time for prayer. I fasted during the day, eating sparingly only before dawn and after sunset.
    But it wasn’t easy to stay alert for a special sign. There was so much coming and going in the compound, and I didn’t want to ask Imma or Safta or Chloe to do my share of the chores. When I sought out a quiet corner for prayer, mygrandmother and sister tried not to disturb me. But my mother made it clear that she thought I was behaving in an odd and rather selfish way.
    Alexandros seemed very busy at the sardine-packing works—too busy, I assumed, to arrange a new marriage for me. I went to talk to him one evening, thinking he was alone on the roof. I intended to ask his permission to visit my aunt in Arbel for a month of peace.
    As I reached the top of the stairs, I realized that Imma and Uncle Reuben were with Alexandros. Pausing in the shadows, I listened to a whispered argument. I couldn’t make out what they were discussing, but my name was mentioned over and over.
    The next day, my mother took me aside. I had a bad feeling even before she spoke, and I burst out, “They haven’t chosen a husband for me already, have they? Alexandros might at least have honored my request for more time!”
    Imma frowned and folded her arms, as if to say she was not to blame. “I did remind them that you had some idea of waiting to discern something. But the men judged that it would seem ungrateful not to accept such a good offer at once.”
    Distressed at the idea of having to drop my search for a sign, it took me a moment to sense that there was more badnews. I stared at my mother. “Who is it?” She hesitated, and I exclaimed, “Not Eleazar bar Yohannes!”
    “It was a
very
good offer,” she said.
    “No!” I exclaimed. “How could Uncle Reuben …? How could Alexandros …?” They knew I’d asked Abba to refuse the old man’s offer the first time. “Doesn’t my brother care how I feel?”
    My mother didn’t answer my questions. “Mariamne,” she said, “I had my heart set on Nicolaos for you; that was such a happy match. But that’s water under the bridge. Now your father’s gone, Nicolaos is gone, and everything’s different.”
    “I know it’s different! It’s dreadful. Why do they want to make it even worse for me?”
    “Hush, Mariamne!” Imma’s eyes flashed. “It’s time you grew up. Life isn’t all honey cakes and jasmine for any of us. Think, for a moment, what the fever did to the rest of us, not just you.” She spoke faster and faster, her words pouring out. “Think about Alexandros: young as he is, he has to take on the burden of being the man of the family. Think about Uncle Reuben: he’s lost not only his brother but also his business partner. Our business isn’t doing well—many of the workers caught the fever, and several of them died. On top of that, the household taxes will be due soon!” She paused, then added in a low tone, “And I … I am … a widow.”
    My mother hardly ever cried, but now tears shone in her eyes. I was shocked and ashamed. “I’m sorry, Imma.”
    “True, this new marriage isn’t what you expected,” she went on, blotting her tears quickly with her sleeve. “But your uncle and your brother are using their best judgment. Eleazar is a respected member of the synagogue. And your brother agreed to provide you with a generous bride-gift; I insisted on that.”
    “A generous bride-gift?” Forgetting about being unselfish, I snorted. How would a bride-gift make up for being married to an old man?
    “Try to think about what’s best for the whole family.” My mother’s tone turned stern again. “After you’re betrothed to Eleazar, you see, Eleazar will sell only our sardines. He’s the supplier for Herod Antipas’s palace in