Free Second Chance by Natasha Preston

Mum would go on about Rhys and I didn’t want to deal with it. Plus, I thought it was worth a try, could’ve gotten a new car out of it.”
    “What do you mean?”
    She picked up the pace, clearly uncomfortable with where this was headed. I wasn’t going to let it go. If there was something about this guy she was unsure of I wanted to know and I wanted to revel in it.
    “I’m not going anywhere, sweetheart.”
    Groaning, she said, “It’s just a little weird, okay. I’m not sure how I really feel about Rhys right now and I don’t want to have to keep talking about how things might go with him in the future. Right now my future is blank and it scares the hell out of me. I’ve never had that, Logan, there’s always been a plan.”
    “You plan too much.”
    “I know I do, but I like knowing what I’m doing and working towards. The unknown scares the crap outta me.”
    “I like it. Not knowing where I’ll be doesn’t bother me. You have to leave room for change, Chlo, or you’ll forever be disappointed.”
    “I can’t help it. You’re so laid back and I wish I could just go with the flow more but I can’t.”
    “Can’t or don’t want to?”
    “Can’t, I think. I don’t like the feeling of everything being out of my control. I can’t control life and death but I can control what I do in between.”
    She couldn’t, though. Chloe could plan right up until the day she died but it wouldn’t all go how she wanted it to. Life was constantly ready to throw more and more shit surprises at you. Control was an illusion, something people claimed to have to make reality seem that much more bearable. No one was in control of anything; in every situation you were either lucky or unlucky.
    I didn’t want to bring her down with my cheerful theories so I took the easy road and kept my mouth shut. “Which route?”
    “Cemetery,” she replied, making me almost lose my footing.
    Back to Jace. I didn’t want to go there. I hated it. You were supposed to die in old age, starting with the eldest. I shouldn’t have buried my brother; it was backwards. He was just a fucking kid, not quite eighteen.
    “Really?” I asked. “Any reason?”
    “Yes. No. I don’t…” She stopped suddenly and I almost rammed into her. “I went on a date last night.”
    Oh, I was painfully aware of that fun fact.
    “And?”
    She bit her lip, which made her look sexier.
    “Not too sure actually.”
    “Right.” I scratched my forehead. I rarely understood women when they said what the fuck was going on so guessing was impossible. “You feel guilty? You said you didn’t.”
    “Not guilty. Maybe like I should, though.” She shrugged. “I just feel like I should talk to him.”
    That was impossible, too.
    “Alright, cemetery is it, but if it’s cool with you I’ll run a lap while you’re talking.”
    She touched my arm, rubbing her thumb over my skin that was oversensitive to her touch. I fucking felt it right where I wanted to. “Of course. I don’t expect you to stay.”
    “Do you want me to stay?”
    “I think I need to talk to him alone.”
    Thank fuck for that.
    It was my turn to speak but there was little left to say other than let’s go and I knew if I said that she’d stop the touching. She didn’t touch me nearly enough and I was getting greedier.
    “Well,” she said, blowing out a big breath and lowering her hand. “Let’s go or this run will never end.”
    I stopped at the gate to the cemetery. Chloe gave me a fleeting smile before jogging to Jace’s grave. I envied her for the way she approached him and sat down. No hesitation.
    My brother was over there and it was the last place on earth I wanted to be. I couldn’t even pretend it was just because I hated the thought of him in the ground. I was in love with his girl, what right did I have to go over there and pour my heart out to him? I could pretend while he was alive but I couldn’t now that he was dead. He would know and I couldn’t face him.