Free Beautiful Lies by Sharlay

“Ok,” it’s the only word that I can get out before a loud bang interrupts us. I look in the direction of the noise but see nothing. I turn back toward Taylor but he is gone, so is the blanket and food.
    “Taylor?” I call out his name. I swing around but he’s nowhere to be seen. I call his name several more times but he’s gone...
     
    My eyes snap open and I gasp for breath. I’m shaking. Taylor...where is he? My eyes search frantically before I let out an exasperated breath. I am in bed, mine and Rick’s bed. I was dreaming. As always my mind taunts me with the same sentence every morning that I awaken. Taylor’s not real. I close my eyes and try to calm down my breathing. Suddenly I hear a loud banging noise, the same one from my dream. I open my eyes again and sit up. The banging comes again. It’s the door. I jump out of the bed, run my fingers through my hair and head toward it.
    I open it slowly and see Jen standing in the doorway, looking frustrated.
    “At last! My gosh, it’s a good job someone wasn’t trying to murder me out here, do you know how long I’ve been knocking for? And why do you look like that?” She says, staring at me in shock. I step aside and allow room for her to walk inside the apartment.
    “I just woke up,” I mumble as I walk toward the living room. I hear her follow behind me. I slump down on the chair and let my head fall back against it before letting out a frustrated breath. I hear Jen sit in the chair opposite me but she doesn’t speak straight away. She just stares at me. When my eyes finally meet hers, she is looking at me sympathetically.
    “Did something happen?” She asks cautiously.
    “Rick left.”
    “What? I don’t understand...”
    “He’s had enough, Jen. What more is there to understand?”
    “Maybe he just needed to cool off. I’m sure he’ll be back soon.”
    “No, he packed his suitcase and left to stay in a hotel, then he’s going to spend some time at his brother’s place.”
    “I’m so sorry, Paige.”
    “Yeah, me too.”
    “I don’t know what to say. I know that you’re going to think that this is your fault but it’s not.”
    “It doesn’t seem that way right now.” I lean forward and rest my head in my hands. “I’ve screwed up everything. He’s never coming back. I just lost my relationship because of an imaginary person,” I feel myself getting angry.
    “Paige...”
    “What? It’s going to be ok? Everything’s going to get better? This isn’t your fault? I’ve heard it all before, Jen. It is my fault and everything’s not going to be ok. He’s gone and that’s it. It’s over. I mean...how could I ever expect him to stay...like this? I’m leading a double life, it’s disgusting.” She stares at me, clearly at a loss for words. I feel the tears roll down my cheeks. I’m so tired. “What do I do, Jen? How do I fix it? How do I stop the pain in my heart?” I genuinely search her eyes for the answers.
    She stands up and walks over to where I am sat. Taking a seat next to me, she wraps her arm around my shoulders. “Time, sweetie, it just takes time.”
    “What if I can never stop the dreams? I’ll never be able to have a normal life. I’ll never be able to be happy.”
    “You will.”
    “In the dreams, with Taylor...I’m pregnant. That’s why Rick left. It’s crazy...in the dreams I’m so happy and excited. I’m making plans for the future, but it’s not real. Now I have to wake up every day and face the fact that there’s no Taylor, no baby and...no Rick.” My tears have slowed down but my heart hurts.
    “Did Clarise help?”
    “Yeah, but it’s pointless now that Rick’s gone.”
    “That’s not true. Maybe with him gone, you won’t be so distracted or have to pretend so much. You can just be free. Maybe your mind needs that to help you to remember.”
    “Maybe.”
    “Well, I’m not leaving you, so we’ll work this out together, ok?”
    “Thanks, Jen,” I say, smiling up at