that kept me busy for quite a while. And then I just wandered. Wandered the hills, drove the back roads, stopping frequently to take pictures of things that caught my eye.
Sometime during the late afternoon, I found myself in Boulder. I stopped at a familiar haunt to grab a bite to eat, all the while thinking of Jack, thinking of the morning, feeling like a teenager with a crush, smiling a secret smile when I remembered. By the time I got to Nederland, the sun had set, but the lights were still on at the Amber Rose. I stopped in to see Sam.
I stepped back and held the door open to allow a matronly patron to leave. Sam’s scowl turned to a bright smile when he saw me coming in.
“What has you looking like such a grump, my friend?”
“That was ol’ Mornin’ Sun. What a complete misnomer. She ain’t anything like her name.”
“I take it she’s not gonna be warming your bed anytime soon?”
Sam made a noise that sounded like a bark and snickered as he wiped down the counter. “Nicest thing I can say about ol’ Mornin’ Sun is that she ain't a twin.”
When I realized what he had said, we broke into laughter.
“No wonder they call you Wicked Sam. You’re incorrigible.”
“I do my best,” he said. “Getcha a cuppa coffee?”
“Not tonight, Sam, but thanks. I just stopped in to see your old face. I wanted to tell you what a treasure I think you are.”
Blushing, he leaned across the bar and patted my hand. “I always knew ya, even though ya didn’t know me, so I jest feel like ya’ve come home. But I gotta say, I been findin’ m’self getting’ madder and madder ‘bout that story ya told. Wish I could have five minutes with that varmit.”
“Oh, Sam, I love that about you, your unconditional acceptance. But here’s a big lesson I learned from Jason. I’m not gonna let anyone steal my joy anymore. HE is not the one that gets to be in charge of my life. It was awful what happened. Let me help you let go of it like you’ve helped me.”
“Jest can’t help but thinkin’ ‘bout what woulda happened ta ya. Ya change lives. I’m glad yer here.”
“There’s nowhere I’d rather be.”
As I drove the short drive home, I thought about how laid back this life was in comparison to what I had known up until this point. Perspective is an amazing thing. I was having a paradigm shift about what was important in my life and what wasn’t.
Completely relaxed, all I wanted was to complete my day in the ‘pond’ they called the bathtub. The water fanned out from the shower head above like a waterfall. As I slid under the warmth of the flowing water, I laughed to myself at the random things that reminded me of Jack, like the ocean blue of the tub being the color of his eyes. Yes, I was smitten, no doubt about it.
So smitten was I that I thought I conjured him up when I opened my eyes and saw him staring at me in the mirror. I closed my eyes, slid deep into the water, and chuckled.
“What’s so funny, little one?” he said softly.
“Jack?!” I said, splashing water as I came up hurriedly.
“You were expecting someone else, maybe?”
“I’d be lying if I said I minded you showing up at odd hours.” I felt myself blushing for my loose tongue and slid deeper under the water.
Jack came in and sat on the edge of this magnificent tub that was worked into the mountainside.
“Your most attractive quality, in my opinion, is that you don’t seem to have a filter on your honesty. I am often surprised you don’t hide behind guile. I’ve thought of little else all day.”
“’Thought of little else all day’ meaning my honesty?” I asked.
Smiling, he turned his gaze on me, the vision I had just been comparing to the blue of the pool. “Thought of little else all day besides you, and many of your different facets,” he said as he walked across the room and removed a towel from the heated holder.
“My facets or my assets?”
“Yes,” he said.
As he approached, he held the towel