Free Nanny Piggins and the Pursuit of Justice by R. A. Spratt Page B

lives in our garden,’ said Samantha truthfully.
    ‘I predict he is about to get very angry,’ said Nanny Piggins.
    The young woman decided to cut her losses. She handed over the money and left in a sulk, muttering about con artists and how she had a good mind to call the police.
    ‘That didn’t go well,’ said Derrick.
    ‘We’ll see,’ said Nanny Piggins smugly, whistling to herself as she packed up her fortune-telling paraphernalia. ‘I think that will do for today.’
    ‘But you’ve only told one fortune,’ protested Michael.
    ‘And you only charged $4.99,’ said Samantha, ‘so you’ve got another $19,995.01 to earn.’
    ‘All in good time,’ said Nanny Piggins. ‘Come along. Since you have been such good children I’ll make chocolate fondue for dinner.’
    ‘It’s Tuesday, you always make chocolate fondue on Tuesdays,’ said Michael.
    ‘Yes, I’m lucky that you always behave so well on Tuesdays,’ said Nanny Piggins.

    The next day Nanny Piggins kept the children home from school. She rang Headmaster Pimplestock and told him they had all simultaneously contracted lead poisoning from too much sucking on pencils. Then she hung up and took the phone off the hook before he had a chance to consult a medical dictionary. Next they went outside and began re-erecting the tent. They had only just got the tent pegs banged into the root stocks of Mr Green’s pedigree rose plants whenthe young woman from the previous day burst back into the tent.
    ‘Good morning,’ said Nanny Piggins brightly, as though this sudden arrival was entirely to be expected.
    ‘You’re a genius!’ gushed the young woman.
    ‘Yes,’ agreed Nanny Piggins.
    ‘A savant . . . a wonder . . . an inexplicable force of nature,’ gabbled the woman.
    ‘All true,’ concurred Nanny Piggins.
    ‘You mean to say that Nanny Piggins’ predictions actually happened?’ asked Michael, being the first of the children to grasp the woman’s strange ramblings.
    ‘See for yourself,’ said the woman, holding up her cardigan.
    ‘See what?’ asked Derrick.
    ‘Exactly,’ said the young woman. ‘There’s nothing there. The button is missing!’
    All three children gasped in amazement.
    ‘But what about being hit in the head with a frozen fish?’ asked Samantha.
    ‘Well, I went to a sushi restaurant last night, and as the chef was walking through the restaurant with a great big frozen tuna on his shoulder, someone called out to him, and when he turned around to sayhello, the tuna’s tail whacked me in the head. Look!’ said the young woman, holding up her fringe and showing them a big black bruise right in the middle of her forehead.
    ‘Amazing!’ said Samantha. ‘But surely you didn’t meet a man who is always wet?’
    ‘I went to the sushi restaurant on a blind date with a man who is a marine biologist. He goes scuba diving every day,’ said the young woman.
    ‘So he’s always wet!’ gasped Samantha.
    ‘Exactly,’ said the young woman. ‘Every word you said came true.’
    ‘I know,’ said Nanny Piggins. ‘I don’t do things I’m bad at.’
    ‘Can you do it again? Because I’ve brought along some friends who want to have their fortunes read too,’ said the young woman.
    ‘Of course,’ said Nanny Piggins. ‘Send the first one in.’
    And so Nanny Piggins’ fortune-telling business took off. Word spread quickly. By the end of the week there were queues wrapped around the block from five o’clock in the morning onwards. And, amazingly, every single prediction Nanny Piggins made came true.
    She told the butcher he would accidentally cutoff a pinkie finger. And the next day he did. Luckily for him it was not his own – it was the work experience boy’s, and he was not disappointed. The doctors sewed it back on and he had quite the story to boast about when he went back to school on Monday.
    She told a young lonely man with a secret passion for flamenco dancing that he would meet the woman of his dreams if he went