Free Yours Truly, Taddy by Avery Aster

money.”
    “Not to us Farnworth’s, that’s lunch.” Vive smiled. “ Claire La Femme offered you six figures for this pictorial spread…didn’t they?”
    “Yup.” I slipped the flower she’d given me behind my ear. Maybe the yummy smell would send nice thoughts about Eden by osmosis into my mind.
    “Didn’t you want to start your own business with some of that money?”
    “Uh-huh. I did. But right now, I wanna go home.”
    “Heard ‘ya the first time, girlie.” Vive looked back at the beach, to where my attention had been all along. “Did something happen out in the water with Leon? You don’t seem like yourself.”
    “Umm Viveca, I was sucked out of a plane and left at sea with nothing but a life jacket. No, I’m not myself. Not anymore.” Avoiding the conversation, I walked over a drawbridge made of gold. Eden’s castle, like something out of a fairytale, was over the top.
    “Hold up.”
    I stopped, glancing over the edge. A moat was filled with colorful fish.
    “You can talk about it, if you want to. I’ll listen.” Her chin rested against my shoulder as she wrapped her arms around me.
    “Promise to refrain from giving me your sassy opinion?” I turned and studied Vive’s face, assessing any traces of self-control. Hmmm . 
    “I swear.” She crossed her heart.
    I held onto the cast-iron railing, glancing at four fish swimming together, side-by-side. “Out there, I thought about life and death. About what would happen if I’d lost you guys?” I blinked away a tear.
    “Honey, don’t cry. Your life would go on without us.”
    “No, it won’t, and I don’t think it would for you either.”
    Vive froze. Her entire body tensed. She knew what I meant.
    I waited for her to say something, but she didn’t. So I provoked her and reminded, “After watching you unbuckle your seatbelt, I’m not sure you believe what’s coming out of your own mouth, because I sure as heck don’t. You wanted to die up there, Vive.”
    “I did not!” Vive seethed through her teeth.
    “Do not insult our friendship and lie to me. So help me, I’ll throw you over this railing into the moat.”
    I would too.
    “Taddy…” The whites of her eyes doubled.
    “Tell me what was going through your pretty, bleach-blond-head when you unbuckled.”
    “No!”
    “You handed Hedda off to Lex. That dog would die without you in her life. And you just tossed Hedda away like your friends would take care of her.” Without thinking, the words flew out of me. I felt sick after I spoke. I didn’t want to hear her answer. But I had to know.
    “I’ve already apologized to Lex and Blake, who finally agreed to drop it. I’ll apologize to you too. I’m sorry for wanting to die up there. Now…let it go.”
    I grabbed her tight, my face pressed up against hers. “You promised us you’d never do that again.”
    A span of our lives together had been spent in darkness. Once before, Vive had tried to kill herself. We’d been in juvie. Somehow she’d gotten her hands on a knife from the cafeteria. After we’d gone to bed, she’d slashed her wrists. 
    Her eyes had changed colors again from white to red. “Don’t remind me. Last night none of us slept between worrying about you, and Lex and Blake going off on me about that non-stop.” Rubbing her forearm against her nose, she fought back a sob.
    Pulling her close, I hugged her. “I’m…sorry.”
    With her breath in my ear, she muttered, “We had a moment on board where everything started to shake. All I thought about was Sanderloo and the night he died. I wanted to punish myself.”
    Hearing Vive’s reasons made my own problems with Leon feel embarrassingly small. “We’ve gone over this a million times. If the state of Connecticut can clear us of all charges, than so can we. We gotta forgive ourselves.”
    “Taddy, I’m allowed to stumble. Maybe…I’ll never be one hundred percent. And if that’s the case, than I’ve made peace with that, which in my own way is