Free Everything I Need by Natalie Barnes

takes me another moment to realize it’s my phone. I can’t remember exactly where I put the damn thing last night, but I know it’s not in my room with me. It sounds like it may be out in the kitchen or something.
    Rolling over onto my back, I rub my face with my hands for a minute, trying to gather myself before I have to get up and face the day. Okay, I was stupid for drinking gin like that last night . . . my head and stomach are both reminding me of that now.
    I just wanted to have a good time with my boys. Maybe a small -I mean very small, I think- part of it, was that maybe I was intimidated by Tristan being there, which might have caused me to overdo it a smidge. God, that sounds so fucking dumb! I can’t let old feelings get in my head now and all this deep thinking about it is making my head feel like it’s going to burst.
    Cringing, I push myself up with my hands, sitting on my bed. I’m still in last night’s clothes, except my shoes are off. I wanna laugh at myself, but then I remember . . . I didn’t take myself home last night. Fucking shit! Tristan drove me home last night! My mouth drops open and I try to remember how it went.
    Let’s see. Roger was trying to be all authoritative, which, by the way, I’m so grateful for. I can’t believe I entertained the thought of driving home. I’m going to have to apologize to him later and thank him. Son of a bitch. He’ll just gloat about it.
    Okay. After that, Tristan wanted to take me home so I wouldn’t drive, but all I remember after that is that chick hanging off his side more than anything else.
    I close my eyes tight, hoping this somehow will bring back more of my memory. I couldn’t help but feel the familiar tickle in my stomach when Tristan wouldn’t take ‘no’ for an answer. I think last night I was pissed off not that he wanted to take me home, but that he was going to go back with her. Oh my God, where in the hell did that just come from? I instantly feel guilty as I think of Benny.
    “What a piece of shit I am,” I mumble to myself.
    Exhausted, I swing my legs over. They hit the side table, shaking a glass of water sitting on top of it. What the . . .? I don’t remember getting that last night, either. I slide my fingertips down the edge of the glass and I can feel the condensation on the sides. There must have been ice in it because it’s still kind of cool.
    Wrapping my hand around it, I bring it up to my lips and greedily drink it down. My mouth soaks in the water immediately. I chug it all; some even spills over and runs down my chin. Anyone watching me would have thought that I’d just crossed the Sahara.
    Breathing in deeply, I stay still so my stomach can adjust to the fullness of the water. Good fucking thing that was there. At least now I feel like I have the energy to move. I really don’t remember getting it though, and then, my heart tightens.
    Did Tristan put this here? I know it’s a small act, but I can’t help but feel cherished. Okay, I need to stop my wandering thoughts right now and call Benny. I don’t hate Tristan . . . well, not anymore. But I can’t open my wounds up again for him, either.
    Stepping into my kitchen, I see my purse on the table with my keys lying beside it. I pull my phone out and I have five missed calls and a text. The calls are all from Benny, going back almost two hours, and the most recent was a text from Frankie. I slide my index finger across the screen and pull up the text first. Frankie, all melodramatic, will assume the worst if I don’t answer.
    Peering down at it, I smile and shake my head.
    Good morning, beautiful! :D Let’s get some shopping done for your sexy self. When are u leaving? Tomorrow, right?
    Oh shit! I have to leave in the morning and feeling like this, it’s gonna be hell having to get everything ready. Letting out a sigh, I text him back real quick.
    Yep, leaving tomorrow. I have enough clothes, Frankie. I don’t need any more. LOL
    I press send then I pull