Free Second Chances by Tracy Younker

those times. I just want to be left alone to sit and think and brood in peace. Part of me also seems to be a little more hyper-aware of his antics because I am also aware that Chase is here. I can't help but wonder what Chase will think of my relationship with Parker when he finds Parker's arm around me. Chase certainly has no right to just assume anything about me. Still though, I don't want him to think that there is something between me and Parker, because there definitely is not.
    Max spins around to pick up Griff and I know it's my turn now. I guzzle down half my beer hoping to numb some of this anxiety, and try to be blunt as I shove Parker's arm off of me. As I stand up, I glance back and find Chase watching me just as I'd been afraid of. He smiles and his look is so intense and focused on me that I force myself to quickly look away. I don't need any more butterflies, as a whole flock are fluttering in my belly already. I pull off my tank and toss it into the side compartment and hand Max my beer to set aside for me. I slide into my life vest and lean over the edge of the boat to set my board in the water. I swear I can feel Chase's eyes burning holes in my backside and my face flames at the way that makes me feel inside.
    Max shouts something to me, but I'm already in the water by then. I pull my feet into the boots on my board, grab the rope, and wait for Max to ready the boat. I give him a thumbs-up signal and then I am gliding on top of the water again. The beer must be working because I feel a warm flush throughout my body and that familiar adrenaline rush that I love so much takes over. I don't think about who is in the boat or what the future holds as I drive in and out of the wake and spring the board up into the air. I feel weightless for a few brief seconds in the middle of a trick and it's pure bliss. Nothing pulling me down, nothing heavy or unsettling. My focus is so narrow that there is no room in my head right now for all the problems in my life. It's really too bad I can't just stay out here forever.
    As usual I have no idea how long I've been flipping and spinning behind the boat but fatigue begins to set in and I catch an edge and splash down into the cool lake. Those few moments beneath the surface of the water are another kind of zen for me. From the noise up above--the humming of the boat motor and the slapping of the water beneath my board--to this heavy, pure silence and stillness. Two extremes but I crave them both when life is too out of control.
    When I surface, Chase is at the back of the boat looking down at me with those bright blue eyes of his and he takes my board for me. I fight the exhaustion in my limbs as I climb up the ladder. Chase turns, almost bumping into me, we are standing so close. He reaches down and hands me a towel and I manage to squeak out a small 'thanks' before I basically collapse onto the seat behind me. I don't feel like walking all the way up to the front and dealing with Parker and his paws right now.
    Max asks Chase again and he defers his chance once more, so Parker dons a life vest. Of course Parker can't walk past me without sliding his hand down my arm as he tells me I had a great run before he jumps in.
    I am flattered beyond belief when Chase tells me that he thinks I looked incredible out there, and I find my cheeks burning again. I hadn't felt anything close to that when Parker told me the same thing. I'm certainly not the type of girl who is always looking for compliments but this particular one coming from my childhood best friend who knows exactly where I come from means the world to me. He also happens to be a famous wakeboarder now, so his opinion holds even more clout. I can tell from the expression on his face that he's sincere, not that I ever doubted the old Chase. In some ways, I feel like I no longer know the guy sitting beside me, but then subtle things -- like a look in his eyes, an expression, or a moment of that same old humility -- make me