Free Messy Beautiful Love by Darlene Schacht Page A

the way I’ve taken a step back in our marriage. I’ve given up my right to be in charge so that Michael can lead us in the best way he knows how. I’d like to say that I’ve given up my desire to lead, but I think that deep inside there’s always going to be the human desire to take over and say, “Look, you’re doing this wrong!” After all, we’re two different people with two different ideas of how things should be done. What if he fails? What if he makes the wrong choice? The truth is that he will . Any of us would, and we do. The bottom line is that we’re all a work in progress, growing and learning every step of the way.
    If I want my husband to grow into a strong man who is ready and willing to lead our family, I need to allow him that room to grow. I need to allow him to make grilled cheese until he works his way up to beef stew. I haven’t always been willing to do this. As you probably guessed from the first chapter, I’ve been a rebellious brat. But grace has a way of turning my eyes to the Lord where I see a plan that’s much better than mine. One in which a wife steps down in humility and allows her husband to lead.
    My purpose is to glorify God in the way that I live by walking in obedience to His Word.
    That Word tells me, “As the church is subject untoChrist, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it” (Eph. 5:24–25).
    When we consider everything that Jesus did for us, we can see the responsibility that is asked of our husbands. They whipped Him, they spat in His face, they ridiculed Him, and they nailed Him to a cross. His response to all that was grace . He didn’t come to condemn us; instead He lowered Himself to the level of a servant and washed His disciples’ feet. He came in humility that we might be saved.
    Yes, the Bible tells us that the husband is the head of the wife and that the wife should submit to his authority. With that in mind we should remember that submission is a choice that we make. It’s not something that is or should be imposed on us by another person. It’s our response to God’s love. It is a choice we make out of obedience to God because ultimately everything we do should focus on Him and His will. There’s a reason we do it, and that reason is to please God.
    We see the beauty of submission since the beginning of time when Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord (1 Peter 3:6).
    Sarah brought glory to God through obedience to her faith. She wasn’t perfect; in fact she laughed when she heard that God was going to bless her with a child. At her age? She was old, and as far as she was concerned, it was impossible.
    God doesn’t use perfect people to build His kingdom; He uses those who walk in obedience to Him, but in order to dothat we must submit to His will for our lives. Samuel said, “Hath the L ORD as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the L ORD ? Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice, and to hearken than the fat of rams” (1 Sam. 15:22). You see, it’s easy to make a sacrifice to the Lord—go to church on Sunday, put money in the collection plate, send a box of toys to Goodwill, and the list goes on—but to bring our lives under obedience to God is where the real challenge lies.
    We live in a society where hundreds of thousands of people say that they believe in Jesus, but how many of us are willing to walk in obedience to His commands?
    What if the wisdom of God doesn’t make sense to your situation? What if it doesn’t feel good to submit to the Lord? What if it doesn’t feel good to submit to your husband?
    Some follow the wisdom of God, but others start looking around for an easier way. Scripture is bent out of shape to justify a better way of doing things.
    Those who treasure Jesus Christ honor His authority in their lives and walk in obedience to the faith.
    This mind-set of submission is