Free The Good Vibrations Guide to Sex by Cathy Winks, Anne Semans Page A

years ago. With Viagra, it’s like borrowing a younger penis for three hours.
     
I rarely orgasm as strongly as I used to when I was younger. I now use Viagra to help me get and keep an erection, and I am satisfied with the results.
    While Viagra is a useful sex enhancer for many men, it’s no magic bullet. It doesn’t necessarily create firmer or longer-lasting erections than you would otherwise have. It won’t inspire desire, boost a flagging libido, or bridge the emotional distance created by insufficient intimacy or communication. Before running to your doctor for a prescription, we’d encourage you to take the time to evaluate how crucial erections are to your sex life. Many men find that as they get older and are less able to have erections on demand, they expand their sexual activities to include more nongenital touch, oral sex, playing with vibrators, and penetrating their partners with either a dildo or a soft penis. It may be that your partner is less attached to intercourse than you might think and would be happy to build a sex life based on any one of the numerous pleasurable alternatives.
At the age of 64, the sensitivity of my penis diminished markedly, and erection and orgasm became much more difficult to achieve. This has not been a difficult adjustment for me as sex can now be much more relaxed and less goal-oriented. When I do achieve orgasm, the sensation is definitely still there.
    Ejaculation
    Although they tend to be inseparably linked in many folks’ minds, ejaculation and orgasm are two distinct physiological phenomena, controlled by different nerve groups in the spine. Ejaculation is the result of a build-up of sexual tension that causes muscles near the prostate gland to contract, sending fluids from the prostate gland and seminal vesicles into the urethra. This produces the sensation referred to medically as “ejaculatory inevitability” and popularly as “ohmigod, I’m about to come!” Seconds later, intricately timed signals from the brain close off the valve between the bladder and the urethra and propel the ejaculate down the urethra and out the penis. Generally, ejaculation is accompanied by the involuntary, rhythmic contraction of the pelvic muscles, which is experienced as orgasm. However, it’s possible to pass over the neurological point of no return and ejaculate without having yet reached orgasm:
I don’t remember having an orgasm without ejaculation, but I have ejaculated without an orgasm—a disappointing experience!
    It’s also possible for a man to reach orgasm without ever ejaculating. Orgasm without ejaculation can be the result of retrograde ejaculation, which occurs when the valve between your bladder and urethra doesn’t close and ejaculate is forced back into the bladder, rather than out the urethra. Retrograde ejaculation sometimes happens in men with spinal injuries or in men who have had prostate or bladder surgery—it should not adversely affect the pleasure you experience during orgasm.
After surgery to reduce an enlarged prostate, ejaculation no longer happens as usual—it’s retrograde ejaculation with the semen being voided with the urine. It’s been an adjustment but no problem. Also, no mess!
    Orgasm without ejaculation can also be a conscious technique in men who train themselves to bypass the expulsion of semen and to experience the pleasurable full-body sensations and muscular contractions of orgasm without ejaculating. We’ll discuss the phenomenon of orgasm without ejaculation in the Multiple Orgasm section below.
     
    PREMATURE EJACULATION: Whether you are ejaculating “prematurely” or not is, of course, in the eye of the beholder. There are no absolutes when it comes to how long intercourse “should” take place before a man ejaculates. Whether the time involved is a minute or an hour, ejaculation is only premature if either partner wishes it had been delayed. It’s worth noting that very few gay men report problems with premature