Free The Devil's Beating His Wife by Siobhán Béabhar Page A

established that." I felt disgusted with myself. I had broken an old vow—never to touch this woman again. Now, I had to live with yet another mistake.
    Mary-Alice's mouth opened and closed. She raised her hands to cover her face as she wept softly. "I told myself that this would never happen," she said. "Not with you."
    I didn't want to hear it. I didn't want to deal with her tears. "I need to go."
    "You used me. And I let you. But that's not the worst of it. You called me her name." She pushed against my chest, and I stumbled backwards from the force of the blow. "You called me Spicey. Why don't you see that she hates you? She has always hated you. I gave you my virginity, but that didn't matter to you. Only she mattered."
    This time when she made to push me, I grabbed her hands and forced her back towards the wall of the barn. I lowered my face towards hers. "You and I both know I wasn't the first. Did Carver believe that lie? Did he believe your tears as you told him that he nearly ripped you apart? My brother's a fool if he believed that."
    "You used me and got me pregnant. Then you left me and joined the Army," she whispered.
    I shook my head. This was an old, tired argument between us. "Molly wasn't mine."
    "How can you say that? Everyone said she favored you over Carver. You know she was yours." She shook her head as if to rid it of disbelief. "But you didn't want me or our daughter. You wanted that little nigger."
    That word coming from her lips truly incensed me. "Don't you ever use that word around me." I slammed my fist into the wood near her head. She shrunk away from me as fear crept into her eyes. "Now you and I both know that Molly was born over nine months after we were last together. You had already moved on to Carver by then. That child was not mine."
    She closed her eyes and sunk down onto the floor. She wept as I stepped away from her and left the dark barn. As I walked away, I glanced towards the house and saw that the boys were still laughing and drinking in the kitchen. With my head lowered, I shot one last glance in Mary-Alice's direction and then I started my long walk home.

 
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
    CHAPTER FOUR
     
     
    April 12, 1945, Wilkinson County, Georgia
     
    Cold water poured down on me. I flopped onto the floor like a suffocating fish. My drenched pajamas clung to my body. I swiped my hand over my face to stop the water from dripping into my eyes. "What the hell?"
    There hovering over me was my mother. Her skin was flushed. Her breaths were quick and shallow. "I can't think of another time when I have been so disgusted with you, Baxter."
    I blinked a few times before I realized that she was angry. Very, very angry with me.
    "It's all over town, what you did yesterday! What is wrong with you? Can't you think with something other than your dick?" She shrieked and threw the tin bucket at my head.
    I ducked just in time. The bucket collided with the headboard and banged to the ground. Mother launched towards me and slapped me across my face. "Why can't you leave that poor woman alone?"
    That was an abrupt change. Mary-Alice had gone from being a slut to that poor woman. I didn't think Mother had it in her. "Mother, please calm down. I can explain what happened yesterday. It never should have happened. I hadn't been thinking clearly."
    "That's obvious, Baxter."
    She watched me from the corner of her eye as her face was turned away from me. Not only was I disgusted with myself, but I had also deeply shamed my mother. Oh, God. If she knew, then surely Carver knew as well.
    "I know what you're thinking. How could I have done this to Carver, but I—"
    Her hand sliced the air, cutting off my words. "Leave Carver out of this."
    I could feel my mouth fall open. "But he's a part of this."
    "I know that, you dumb ass. None of us would be where we were if your hot-headed brother hadn't hurt that boy. But that stupid slut of his told everyone that boy had tried to molest