Free Twin Flames by Lexi Ander Page B

hell; I'm not sure what I wanted so I didn't move or look away until he'd finished eating. His eyes held mine until my skin felt taut and my pulse raced. I was paralyzed with indecision.
We'd only had casual contact since returning from Seattle. Now I wanted to touch him and to be touched in return. What would he think if I did that? Not that I'd ask him anytime soon. My eyes followed him as he scraped his chair back, got up, and walk out the back door with that lazy cowboy stroll. I still couldn't help watching. Was that good or bad? I sat at the table, wondering what I should do.
I was lusting after my best friend in a big way. Did I want Ushna or was he just someone with whom I was comfortable and felt safe with? I'd better figure it out before I accidentally ruined our friendship because my newly awakened libido was making the decisions for me.
All day, I observed the ranch hands work. I noticed who was better looking, who had great smiles, who had attractive shoulders. I swear all of them had fantastic asses but none of them affected me like Ushna's did. Entering the barn, I naturally sought him out first. I'd compared everyone to him and no one even came close.
As I checked out everyone else, I occasionally caught Ushna looking at me with a stormy expression. When our eyes met, he'd turn away and pretend to be busy with something else. I wasn't sure what to make of his behavior. I was sure he was wondering the same about mine.
Randy was in the ring putting a bronco through her paces when there was a commotion behind me. Ushna was in the tack room. I watched as he threw his horse blanket, saddle, and bridle out the door before he came stomping out and kicked the door shut. I couldn't remember the last time Ushna had had a fit of temper.
His movements were jerky and abrupt as he saddled Blue Bells who regarded him with a disinterested eye. I leaned against the corral fence and wondered who'd pissed him off. I kind of felt sorry for the poor bastard if Ushna was angry enough to confront the person.
Ushna didn't say anything. He rode Blue Bells to the pasture. I watched him go with longing and wondered when he'd be back.
    I was glad I hadn't waited outside for him. It would've been a long wait. It was dusk when he rode into the yard and it was another half hour for him to brush down and feed Blue Bells before he came in.
    I'd made dinner hours ago and had given up waiting on him to eat with me. I had a plate covered in foil for him in the oven. Quickly finishing up in the kitchen, I was drying my hands when he came stomping through the back door. I opened my mouth to tell him dinner was in the oven but didn't get a chance as he stormed through the kitchen without stopping. I followed silently in his wake but he slammed the bedroom door.
    I was starting to get a complex. Had I done something to piss him off?
I briefly thought about knocking on his door and asking, but was unsure enough of his response to retreat to my room instead. I won't admit that I leaned against the wall that separated our rooms, trying to hear what he was doing. I wouldn't be that nosy.
It was Ushna and Ushna alone who caused my body to react. I'd found other men attractive but hadn't wanted to be touched by them. I realized there were several things I wanted from Ushna, and they were things I'd want from a lover, not a friend. I had no idea if Ushna returned my interest but I wouldn't know until I asked, right?
I hadn't had a lover in such a long time, I didn't know how to act. It'd been so natural before to bed Theo. I had always thought it was just a part of being his Flame that made the seduction come so effortlessly.
I was beginning to wonder if it had been easy because I knew I wouldn't be turned down, or because Theo was a slut. Ushna could reject me and where would that leave me? Should I leave it and try to go on as before? Or did I take a chance?
I couldn't ask him to be my lover if I couldn't offer him something more than friendship. He