for at least those three months.
Remember, on average it takes three to twelve months from the start of training until your child will be going to the bathroom independently.
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5
A Menu of Potty Training
Ideas
Every child is different, every parent is different, and every toilet training situation is entirely different; for those reasons, it’s foolhardy to think that one exact method will work the same way with every family. Lots of people are misled into trying a plan that worked beautifully for someone else but that falls flat for them, because it doesn’t mesh with their family’s unique personality. Many of the basic principles of potty training will be common to all, but the variations on the process are vast. So take a little time to map out your plan before you get started or before you start over after a previously unsuccessful attempt at potty training.
This chapter provides you with many suggestions and ideas. So grab a pen or highlighter and read through these pages with your particular needs in mind, mark-ing as you go. Then decide what exactly you’ll be doing over the next few months.
Introduce the Potty
Sure, your child has been in the room when you’ve used the toilet. But chances are she’s had no clue what 71
72
The No-Cry Potty Training Solution
Kyleigh, sixteen months old
you were up to. She’s also been eliminating in her diaper without giving it a thought for a long time. The idea of doing her business in the potty is almost certainly a brand-new concept—“You want me to do
what?! Where?! ” In some ways this will be like teaching your child a second language, so first things first.
Tell her what’s what.
Either take your child with you to select a potty chair or present one to her with a flourish. Give a brief lesson about what it’s for, and then let her investigate this new contraption. Don’t expect that she’ll totally understand right off. It will take some time for her to really come to terms with how the potty will fit into her life.
If you haven’t yet, start reading books to your child about other children who are learning to use the potty.
I’d suggest that you read more than one or two, because A Menu of Potty Training Ideas
73
some will make more sense to her than others, and she’ll likely pick up an important point or two from each one. You might even want to write your own potty book, as discussed later in this chapter.
A few casual conversations about pee, poop, and the potty are helpful, too. If you haven’t before, start announcing your own trips to the bathroom so your child can observe that you do this new thing, too.
Just Sitting There Is Success
When you first get started, just getting your busy toddler to sit on the potty for more than ten seconds is progress! Toddlers are full of energy, and during the learning time, your child may find it rather difficult to sit still long enough for something to actually happen.
It might even be confusing to her, and she may be wondering, “What the heck am I supposed to do here, anyway?” You may want to read, sing, or talk with her while she is sitting so that she’ll stay for longer than a moment or two. It won’t be until she makes a few deposits into her potty or the toilet that she’ll grasp exactly what you expect to happen when you have her sit there.
Praise your child for going through the actions of getting to the potty and sitting there, even if it’s just for a moment. Let her know that you’re proud of her
attempts.
Don’t Expect a Deposit Every Time!
At first, there will be lots and lots and lots of dry runs.
Also, your trainee may wet or soil his diapers or training pants immediately after getting off the potty. This 74
The No-Cry Potty Training Solution
is because it’s necessary to relax the muscles for elimination to occur. When potty training is a new event, your child will likely be excited, tense, or distracted while sitting on the