Free The Bachelorette Party by Karen McCullah Lutz

the motions and pretend it was time in order to prove it wasn’t to those who insisted it was.
    Nancy clapped her hands with glee. “This is going to be so much fun! We’ll all four go to dinner!”
    Zadie thought about objecting, but then realized this could actually be beneficial. As painful as it would be to watch Nancy on a date, at least she wouldn’t have to carry the conversation herself. “Yeah. Okay.”
    “Are you free on Saturday?”
    “Unfortunately, yes.”
    Dolores shook her head in wonder. “I was starting to think this day would never come.”
    Zadie had been sure this day would never come. Now that it had, the universe seemed somewhat askew.
    “I’ll call Darryl at lunch and we’ll work out all the details.” Nancy gave Zadie a squeeze, pleased as punch to be a participant in what was clearly, in her mind, a foregone love match.
    Zadie entered her classroom with a belly full of dread. She knew nothing about Doug. He could be heinous. He could be gorgeous. He could hate her on sight. She could cringe at the sound of his voice. All this effort just to get her friends to shut up? She was far too giving a person.
    The bell rang and her first-period students took their seats. Jessica Martin raised her hand, most likely to show off her manicure. “Okay, I know that William Faulkner is supposed to be a genius and all, but is it just me or are the first three chapters of As I Lay Dying completely incoherent? Who are these people? What the hell are they talking about? And why do they keep repeating themselves?”
    Zadie had to think carefully about her answer. She completely agreed with Jessica, but saying that would not be politically sound. “Well, you have to remember, it’s a story about people who live in a different time and place.”
    “Well, why does Faulkner have to write about those people? They’re annoying.”
    “Just think of it as a window into a part of humanity that you would never get to see otherwise,” Zadie answered.
    “Okay, but can you maybe pick a book that’s more interesting next time? I don’t care about where these people bury their mother. It’s gross.”
    “I’ll do my best.”
    Zadie could’ve explained to Jessica that the head of the department was the one who picked the books, but why bother? She’d just spent the morning explaining to Dr. Reed why she didn’t need to go on a date and now she was going on one. People don’t listen. So why bother to talk? They’re just going to hear what they want to hear, or ignore you altogether.
    It occurred to her that this was perhaps an unhealthy attitude for a teacher to have.
    On Saturday morning, Zadie decided to go to the gym. It had been at least a month and it seemed like a good pre-date thing to
do. At least it would distract her from the fact that she would soon be saying things like, “So, what do you do for fun?”
    She threw on a ratty T-shirt and shorts and called Grey to meet her there. Their gym had several million cardio machines, all facing a giant window overlooking Ventura Boulevard, as if the sight of traffic would be inspirational. As they rode on neighboring Lifecycles, Grey looked over at her, offering half a Red Bull.
    “I’m proud of you.”
    Zadie drained the Red Bull, hoping that whatever “taurine” was would help make exercise less boring. “What’d I do?”
    “You’re going out on a date. I think this will be good for you.”
    “Yes, I’m sure Doug will be just like a shot of wheat grass juice.” She upped the resistance on the bike. As long as she was here, she wanted to sweat.
    “Are you going to have sex with him?” he teased.
    “Of course. In the car on the way over, at the restaurant, and probably in the parking lot after dinner. But only if we can do it up against the Dumpster.” She was starting to breathe heavily now. And not from the thought of Doug against a Dumpster.
    “I’ll take that as a no,” Grey said, pedaling faster.
    “I’d say there’s better odds of