ever imagine.
“You OK?”
“Yes, I had no idea what to expect,” I admitted and wrapped my arms
around him. I wanted to yell to the world, ‘Mitchell Donovan, I love you!’ But
he said it first.
“Renie, I have to tell you something before either of us makes another
move. I want you to know that wasn’t just to get in your pants.” I felt tears in
the corners of my eyes and he leaned over me to kiss them away. “I love you.”
“Oh, Mitchell, I think I fell in love with you the day you leaned on the rake
at Granny’s and asked me to go to a movie,” I laughed nervously, just as his
watch alarm went off. “I just wasn’t sure what love felt like until now. What’s
the alarm for?”
“So we can get dressed and run by the Teen Center, get our hands stamped
and dance a bit so I didn’t completely lie to your dad.”
Slowly, with trepidation, she began to open up. Sometimes, prompted by
my own revelations, she began slipping the things she needed to let me know
out in the open. And I told her some things. She needed to know what I went
through, too.
“You left me broken, Renie. When you walked away… I told you that I
pouted, but I was in mourning for a long time. I grieved you. Some days, just
getting out of bed was a chore. I struggled to move forward.”
“I was on a date one night about three years ago and I saw you across the
room. God granted me his favor, and I never bumped into you, never caught a
glimpse of you until that night. You were with John Welsley and some other
people I recognized from Welsley and Ryan. I’d prayed for all those years that I
wouldn’t run into you because I didn’t know if it would kill me, or if I would
kill you.”
“The hostess showed us to a table and I quietly asked if there was
something closer to the back. When we reached the next table the girl I was
with wanted to sit facing the window so that she could look out. My only
choice was a seat that faced your direction, but we were far enough away that I
felt sure you wouldn’t notice me. The restrooms were on the other side of the
restaurant so I knew there was no reason you would walk by.”
I watched Renie. I saw ruefulness and sorrow in her eyes. A tear slid down
her cheek. I touched her face to wipe it away. I didn’t say anything for a few
seconds, giving both of us a chance to collect our emotions.
“Adria, that was her name, I couldn’t remember. Adria was chattering
away, and I heard her, but I wasn’t listening. I was trying not to see you but, to
my dismay, I couldn’t STOP seeing you. You looked even more beautiful than
the last time I’d seen you. I closed my eyes and I saw you. Every time I looked
up, my eyes locked on you across the room. In my mind, as Adria babbled on
about her dress, her hair, or her shoes, I saw only you, and every moment of
‘us’ passed through my memory.”
“I wanted to get up and run across the room, grab you, and shake you. I
wanted to yell to the world that I wanted you to come back to me.”
I looked up and Renie was crying, but I couldn’t stop.
“Finally, your group left, and we finished our meal. I took Adria home – to
her home, not mine. I told her I didn’t feel well and that I’d call her, but I never
did. That night, as I lay awake, I still saw you, and my heart broke again.”
“Mitchell,” she wept.
We both cried for our past, but I believed we were trying to look forward,
and wonder about a future.
n
After our shower, I went to the kitchen to prepare dinner. While the
stuffed shells were in the oven we packed another box to take home. After our
meal, we cleaned up and went to the living room to see what was on TV.
“I want to show you something,” he said as he sat down. He picked up a
picture from the end table and handed it to me. I flipped it over and held it, just
sat there staring at it. Finally, I started to cry. It was our wedding picture.
“Where did you get this?” I blubbered.
“Before I brought