Free Charisma by Jeanne Ryan

always been a drama queen, but I never realized she had such a flair for public speaking.
    Sammy barges into my room and hops to the desk. “Wow, Chloe’s gone all movie star.”
    â€œYou got that right.” I add a “Yay!” to the sixty other comments under her video, even though I haven’t ridden my bike in a year.
    Humming, I eat oatmeal with Sammy, get ready for work, and drive to the pool. Will the Charisma make my day tolerable or even fun? I wade through my shift waiting for the urge to do something radical such as sing in public, but as the hours pass, there are no random acts of exhibition. And the kids in swim class all want to be on the other teacher’s team for games. My workday is basically a neutralized version of my shift on Saturday. Oh well, if a lack of bad stuff happening is all the Charisma ends up giving me, I’ll call it a win. I leave for the day, more relieved than anything else.
    After work, I pick
Flowers for Algernon
from my school’s required summer reading list. Fifty pages in, I put it aside and go to the mirror to examine my face. A more extroverted me should look different, right? The same old wary gray eyes stare back. I try on a few smiles to see if they reveal anything more sociable, but I look more loony than magnetic.
    The doorbell jolts me from my inspection.
    Downstairs, Evie bounces inside. Her gaze darts meaningfully toward my room.
    We run upstairs, out of Mom’s earshot. Once on my bed, Evie examines me with a somber expression. “So, how are you doing?”
    For a moment I think she’s onto the Charisma, until I realize the last time she saw me I was soaked through after fleeing Drew’s house like a madwoman. I wave off her scrutiny. “I’m over that. Blame it on the beer. Now tell me about Rafe.”
    She considers me for a moment longer, and, apparently satisfied I’m beyond any lingering hysteria, she breathlessly describe s how she and Rafe got together after the party, again last night, and they’ll hang out tomorrow.
    My applause is sincere. “Fantastic!”
    She throws herself backward, arms overhead and dangling over the side of the bed. “Feels like it’s taken forever, and now boom, boom, boom, it’ll be three times in five days. What if he gets tired of me?”
    I kick her foot. “Oh no you don’t. The more he gets to know you, the more he’ll want to be with you.”
    She pulls her arms down to hug herself, shivering. “Senior year could be so amazing.” She halts. “If only you and Jack . . .”
    â€œYeah, I know.”
    â€œThere’s still a chance, Aiz. He really, really likes you. I can tell. But you’ve got to let him know you feel the same. No more running. I know it isn’t easy.” She balls her fists and pounds the quilt at her sides. “Both of us could have the senior years we’ve dreamed of.” As she says the words, her eyes become sad, as if she envisions a less-than-amazing senior year for me. One where she moves into more and more experiences and I’m left behind. But that might not come to pass after the huge chance I took yesterday. How can I not share news this gigantic? It’s not like Evie would report me to the FDA.
    But I can’t.
    Her sigh is long and loud. “I was so sure exposure therapy was the answer. In some patients it actually alters their brain scans.”
    â€œHey, have you given up on me? Because I haven’t.”
    She turns to her side and leans on her forearm. “I’d never give up on you. I just don’t know what else to try.” Her voice breaks.
    I sit on the bed next to her. “You’re creative. I’m sure you’ll come up with some exposure that doesn’t involve another party. Not until I’m ready, anyway. But maybe I could try something small. Teeny-tiny.”
    â€œYou sure? There are lots of things lower on the