Free Whatever It Takes by L Maretta

beat us out for the Tricore account then?”
     
    “Afraid so,” I had told her smugly.  The Tricore guys had just signed with us.  I had known there was another company competing with us for their business but I had no idea she worked for them.
     
    “Lucky you.  So what are you up to this evening?”
     
    I had told her I was just going to head back to my room for a bite to eat and then just watch television but she had asked me to join her in the hotel restaurant.
     
    “Come on,” she had said, “it’ll be great to catch up.”
     
    I should have said no.  I don’t know why the hell I didn’t.  I rationalized that we were both married and that Emma wouldn’t have cared.  But then I thought if she were having dinner with an ex without my knowledge I sure as shit would care.  Still, I agreed to have dinner with her like the asshole I am.
     
    We made small talk while we ate, talking mostly shop but then after our plates had been cleared she asked me about my marriage.
     
    “It’s fantastic,” I had told her.  “Emma is incredible.”  I had smiled and thought back to our phone conversation the night before.  “We just finished remodeling a place we bought last year and we’re going to try for kids soon.  How about yours?”
     
    I had asked the question out of common courtesy, not expecting more than just a “fine” back.  When she suddenly moved from her seat in the booth across from me to next to me, to say I was shocked was the very least.
     
    “Gavin,” she had confessed, “I am completely miserable.”  She had looked at me with pitiful eyes while I had stared back with wide, surprised ones.  “My husband and I hate each other.  No, hate conveys actual feeling.  We feel nothing, Gavin.  Absolutely nothing.”
     
    I had opened my mouth to speak but no words would come out.  I didn’t know what the hell to say to her.
     
    “I never should have broken up with you, Gavin.  It was the worst mistake of my life and I have been regretting it for years.  We were so good together and I ruined it.  I was so stupid.”
     
    Like the bastard I am, hearing this had made my ego swell with pride.  Serves her right, I had thought.  That’s what you get for doing what you did to me.
     
    “I want you back, Gavin,” she had said and that was the slap to the face I needed.  I had finally scooted as far away from her in the booth I could get and told her no.
     
    “I’m married, Lisa, and I love my wife.  I’m sorry your marriage isn’t working out but I love Emma.”
     
    She pretended not to hear me and started with the tears.  “I love you, Gavin, I’ve never stopped loving you.  I don’t know what I was thinking when I broke up with you, I was scared, I guess.  Please, I will do anything.  Just come up to my room with me.”
     
    She had leaned in then and kissed me.  It wasn’t long and it wasn’t passionate but her lips touched mine and for some reason I didn’t push her away.  Instead, like a prick, I concocted a plan.  A plan that would backfire and fuck everything up in epic ways.
     
    I can’t even recall what happened from that point on but the next thing I knew I was fucking Lisa from behind while she bent over the wooden desk in her room.  She had been moaning and grunting while I had remained quiet, fucking her furiously and without feeling.  It had taken her saying, “Oh, yes, I love you, Gavin,” for me to finally realize exactly what I had been doing and push away from her in disgust, the horror of what I had just done finally sinking in.
     
    “What’s wrong?” she had said, straightening herself up while I stormed into the bathroom and flushed the condom.  I had zipped myself back into my pants and completely ignored her cries of protest.
     
    I looked around the room to make sure I wasn’t forgetting anything and then turned to speak to her.  “This never happened,” I had seethed.  “It was a fucking mistake and it meant