Free Getting Old Can Kill You by Rita Lakin

to Sophie and Bella. Ida keeps pushing his face back so he can keep his eyes on the road. He is excited. “So you are lady detectives. This is so thrilling to me. I myself have dreams of going into the business of solving crimes. What was your best case?”
    The girls by now are having a wonderful time. Sophie and Bella are enjoying the nonalcoholic beer that Rico is sharing with them. He has a cooler filled with cans that sits on the floor under Ida’s feet. They are feeling quite cheerful, as if there really was liquor in the cans. Ida, of course, will drink only bottled water.
    Rico has managed to charm them with his cuteness and enthusiasm. He wants to hear all about the cases they solved. They have been listing past successes, such as the Grandpa Bandit case. Romeo, the senior killer of elderly ladies. The eighty-five-year-old wife who was spying on her ninety-year-old husband, thinking he was cheating on her.
    Sophie says, “My favorite was when we were in New York and we captured a thief who was stealing from the church poor box. We had to go underground to get him.”
    Ida corrects her. “That’s undercover.”
    “Whatever,” Sophie tosses back at her. She is feeling no pain.
    Bella sits happily sucking on her nonbeer can, her eyes glazed.
    Rico beams. “You are amazing ladies. So why do you need to be taking these lessons, since you are already experts?”
    The girls look at one another. Ida decides to be the one who answers. “We want to learn more, so we can be better at our work.”
    Sophie and Bella nod their agreement.
    “And,” Ida adds with pride, “we are starting our very own company, Ida Franz and Associates.”
    Sophie hits her elbow against the back of the passenger seat, making Ida jump. “Stop saying that! It isn’t decided yet!”
    Stopping at a light frees Rico to grab hard-boiled eggs from his cooler. And a napkin for the shells. He hands them out. Ida refuses the offer. The others hungrily accept.
    Ida shivers nervously every time he reaches under her feet and takes his eyes off the road.
    The light changes. Rico takes off like a shot.
    Rico is practically leaping out of his seat. “What about another partner? How about me? I am a man of many sides. I can do everything. I am like a man, invisible. You will never regret it. You learn upstairs with Señor Gatkes. I learn from you. We make a good team.”
    Ida holds up her hands. “Rico, you are going too fast for us, and I’m not just talking about your driving.”
    “ Está bien . All right. We take one bebé step at a time. First, I am your number one driver. You call my private number.” He reaches into a mess of papers and maps under his seat and retrieves a crumpled business card. “Day or night, you call, I am there.”
    He grins with his one gold tooth glittering at them. “Is a deal?”
    He pulls up in front of Gatkes’ building.
    Ida says very quickly, “We teach you. You drive us free of charge.”
    Rico grins. “It’s a deal.”

H aving finished with the Sunday papers and enjoyed our brunch, Jack and I head out for our morning dip in the pool. I’m not looking forward to it without Evvie and Joe here. And surprisingly, the girls are absent today. A neighbor already stopped us before we entered the pool gate and reported having spotted the three of them hurrying down the path toward the main gate, trying to look inconspicuous.
    Inconspicuous? Not a chance. That’s a joke at Lanai Gardens. Somehow, anywhere at any given hour, there will be a neighbor who is looking out the window or on a stroll, whose sharp eyes pick up any unusual behavior and immediately the condo jungle drums beat out the news.
    And sure enough, some guy walking his dog early this morning in Phase One was the tattler of unusual activity. The girls are sneaking out? Where are they going? Why aren’t they swimming? Inquiring minds want to know. Which means everybody.
    Sometimes I wonder why we don’t swim at a different time or go to a pool in