Free True Devotion by Dee Henderson Page B

And he wasn’t dating anyone now, hadn’t since Nick was killed—
    She stopped herself abruptly. This was Joe. Her best friend.
    Her emotions had said I love you . He was a great-looking guy, with all the right personal qualities to make her want to hold on to him and not let go. She did want something more with him.
    But her logic was having fits. Joe would never want to date her. She was Nick’s wife. And she didn’t want to marry an active duty SEAL again. She didn’t have the courage to pace the floor and wonder if Joe was going to come home. She needed to marry a civilian. If the intervening years had taught her anything, it was that she didn’t have the courage to face possibly losing a husband again.
    It felt like two sides of her were locked in a tug-of-war.
    Could it even work for them to be more than just friends? Between friendship and marriage there was only room to get hurt. And she was getting the jitters even thinking about it.
    She gave up trying to decide what she wanted. In the end it would not be her decision to make. It would be Joe’s. Everything was a moot point unless he wanted to change their present relationship.
    Lord, please don’t let what I said ruin a good friendship. Please.
    She let her head drop forward a little more as Joe worked out a tangle in the ends of her hair. The brush caught. “Sorry.”
    “It’s okay,” she whispered. She didn’t dare say more.
    His hands settled on her drooping shoulders. “Come here.” She gave a start from her wandering thoughts to hear the amusement in his voice. He turned her toward him and she didn’t even hesitate. She leaned her head forward against his shoulder and relaxed. His arms encircled her. “I’m only half done.”
    “Fine.” She would love to curl up in the warmth she could feel coming through his shirt. She could go back to sleep right here. He felt like a grizzly bear, so wide was the expanse of his chest.
    She felt his quiet laughter. “Not fine. Now only half of you looks like a rag mop.” He rubbed her upper arms. “Five more minutes.”
    “Later.”
    He held her for a few minutes, his head leaning down against hers. Not quite asleep, not quite awake, Kelly found it to be a tranquil place, safe. And better than she had ever imagined it would be. She didn’t get held very often anymore, and Joe . . . She would savor this memory. “Bear?”
    The hand idly rubbing her back paused. “Hmm?”
    “Thanks.”
    She smiled when he kissed her hair.
    “Come on. Back to bed.”

Six
     
* * *
     
    “Go home, Joe.” Kelly could tell he was tired, even he couldn’t cover up the fatigue of two days with broken sleep. And watching him sit there—reclining in the hospital chair, his hands folded across his chest—was very distracting. She noticed everything about him, unfortunately couldn’t help but notice, and it was driving her crazy. A day ago he had been contained in a box called friend. Now it was impossible to put him back into it.
    It had been a long day with a steady stream of visitors. After Liz had come, the guys from Golf Platoon and then friends from work and church had stopped by. She was exhausted.
    “You sure?”
    “I’m going to read for a while then call it a night.”
    He hesitated for a moment, showing a reluctance she found endearing. He nodded. “I’ll be back in the morning.”
    “After your run.”
    “After my run.” He tweaked the edge of her pillow as he got to his feet. “You just want to sleep in.”
    “You got it.” When he leaned over, his hands resting on the edge of the mattress, Kelly moved her head back a few inches on the pillow to look at him. He really was an attractive man, and it wasn’t just her biased opinion. Ruggedly handsome. Fine lines around his eyes, and that tan— The places her thoughts went when she was tired.
    “You did a good job, Kelly, but let’s not do this again, okay? You scared a few years off my life.”
    She let out a soft breath, the emotions in his