Free Everything Changes by Shey Stahl

like?”
    I let out a soft moan as I released the breath I
was holding. My hips rose slightly when his hand went between my legs. “I like
that.”
    His soft grunts as his hand explored a place no
one had been before relaxed me. He didn’t make me feel like what we were doing
was wrong in any way. Instead, he made me comfortable and safe.
    “Like that?” His hand moved again.
    I nodded when his fingers found the right spot
and began their slow movements.
    Parker was literally gasping for breaths, his
lips searching for mine, tasting and teasing, his hips moving against the side
of my thigh searching for some kind of friction.
    When it happened, I saw stars and fairy dust and
unicorns. My brain felt like pure mush. The warm lava spreading through me
settled nicely throughout my entire body, his warm skin like hot coals burning
against me.
    Parker didn’t say anything when I rolled to the
side and reached between his legs.  
    Once I regained some composure and my hands found
his sensitive skin, I stroked him once again. He let out a shaky moan similar
to before, only this time his hips moved forward, forcing my hand down again.
With the light of the moon peeking into his room, I could see that his eyes
were closed, his mouth parted slightly.
    “Show me what you like,” I suggested.
    He waited a moment and then moved my hand in a
slightly different direction. “You can…uh…squeeze a little harder.”   I did. “Fuck…” he moaned, gritty with need,
his back arching as his eyes closed.
    I smiled. The sight of me giving Parker, a boy
I’d fantasized about for months, an orgasm was something I wanted to last
forever.
    “Is this okay?” I asked against his shoulder,
trying to hide my burning cheeks, which I was sure he could feel. “Am I doing
it right?”
    His breathing was labored but he managed to speak
eventually. “Yes.” His breath caught when I increased my speed. It spurred me
on and I became determined in my efforts. Parker’s body tensed, his legs
straightening as he prepared himself. I had nothing to go on. I only knew what
it felt like for me.
    He only lasted another thirty seconds before he
was grunting, his body jerking slightly just about the time a warm liquid
spread over my hand.
    So
that’s what happens.
    Parker was still breathing heavy but relaxed
beside me with a heavy sigh. He turned his head, his lips pressing softly to my
forehead.
    “I’ll be right back,” he whispered before
slipping inside the bathroom attached to his room.
    I sat there staring at my hand for a minute and
then smiled. Regardless of the mess, I was with Parker O’Neil intimately! Fist
pumping the air was almost necessary.
    With his shorts back on, he brought out a warm
wash cloth and handed it to me so I could clean off my hand.   Then I fell back against the bed with a smile
and burning cheeks.
    Part of me felt guilty. Part of me thought maybe
we should have thought twice before doing this, but we didn’t have sex. We just
made each other feel good. There was nothing wrong with that, right?
    “Are you okay?” he asked softly, pulling me
against him once again.
    Feeling the slow steady rhythm of his breathing
calmed the anxiety I felt.
    With my back to him, I felt comfortable talking,
almost as comfortable as I did under the moon. My eyes remained on the white
wall in front of me, searching the cracks for an answer. “I don’t want you to
think I do this with all guys.”
    “I know you don’t. You’ve never look at anyone
the way you look at me.”
    Turning over in his arms, I watched his smile
grow. “You knew I liked you?”
    So much for being conspicuous. There goes your
career as a detective.
    “I thought you knew how I felt.” His fingertips
brushed my hair from my neck, no longer confined in a messy bun. “I hoped you
would have noticed sooner.”
    “I wish I would have.”

    June
23, 1997

    Embarrassment didn’t do it justice when I thought
about how I felt the next morning. The sunlight