Free Extreme Denial by David Morrell

changes. How do you suppose he’s going to react when we tell him that on the spur of the moment you decided to move to Santa Fe, New Mexico, because you saw an old house there being fixed up on television?”
    “An adobe house.”
    “Right. How do you suppose that’ll make him think about the maturity with which you made other snap decisions?” Decker’s muscles hardened. “I told you, my resignation wasn’t a snap decision. I’ve been thinking about it for quite a while.”
    “You never mentioned it to anybody.”
    “I didn’t figure it was anybody’s business.”
    “It was a lot of people’s business. So what made the difference? What pushed you into making the decision? This incident in Rome?”
    Decker didn’t answer.
    Raindrops beaded the windshield.
    “See, I told you it was going to rain,” Ben said.
    The rain fell more heavily, causing a hollow pelting sound on the Pontiac’s roof. Pedestrians put up umbrellas or ran for doorways. The tinted backseat windows made the darkening streets seem even darker.
    “Talk to us about Rome,” Ben said.
    “I don’t intend to talk to anybody about Rome.” Decker strained to keep his breathing steady. “I assume that’s the point of this conversation. You can go back and assure our mutual acquaintance that I’m not indignant enough to share my indignation with anybody—I’m just damned tired. I’m not interested in exposes and causing a commotion. The opposite—all I want is peace and quiet.”
    “In Santa Fe, a place you’ve never been.”
    Again Decker didn’t answer.
    “You know,” Hal said, “when you mentioned Santa Fe, the first thought that popped into my mind was, there are a lot of top-secret installations in the area—the Sandia weapons-testing lab in Albuquerque, the nuclear lab at Los Alamos. The second thought that popped into my head was Edward Lee Howard.”
    Decker felt a weight in his chest. Howard had been a CIA operative who sold top-level details about the Agency’s Moscow operation to the Soviets. After a failed lie-detector test aroused the Agency’s suspicions, he had been fired. While the FBI investigated him, he had moved to New Mexico, had eluded his surveillance teams, and had managed to escape to the Soviet Union. The city where he had been living was Santa Fe.
    “You’re suggesting a parallel?” Decker sat straighter. “You’re suggesting I’d do something to hurt my country?” This time, Decker didn’t bother trying to control his breathing. “You tell our mutual acquaintance to reread my file and try to find anything that suggests I suddenly forgot the meaning of honor.”
    “People go through changes, as you’ve been pointing out.”
    “And these days, most people go through at least three careers.”
    “I’m having trouble following you, Decker.”
    “I had my military career. I had my government career. Now it’s time for my third.”
    “And what’s it going to be?”
    “I don’t know yet. I wouldn’t want to make any spur-of-the-moment decisions. Where are you taking me?”
    Hal didn’t answer.
    “I asked you a question,” Decker said.
    Hal still didn’t answer.
    “It better not be the Agency’s rehabilitation clinic in Virginia,” Decker said.
    “Who said anything about Virginia?” Hal seemed to make a choice. “We’re taking you where you wanted us to take you—La Guardia.”
    4
    Decker bought a one-way ticket. During the six-hour flight, which included a stopover in Chicago, he had plenty of time to think about what he was doing. His behavior was bizarre enough that he could understand why his former superiors were troubled. Hell, he himself was troubled by his behavior. His entire professional life had been based on control, but now he had surrendered to whimsy.
    Santa Fe’s airport was too small for large passenger jets. The nearest major airport was in Albuquerque, and as the American Airlines MD-80 circled for a landing, Decker was appalled by the bleak sunbaked yellow