Free Raining Down Rules by B.K. Rivers

and checked himself into rehab.” His fellow anchors laugh at the remark and continue announcing the news.
    “Is that how the world truly sees me?” Jordan asks. He hasn’t touched his lunch and I have my doubts that he will.
    It’s hard to know how to answer, because I imagine it is the truth. He has really messed things up for himself and his band, but how do you tell that to someone without it backfiring?
    “Jordan, listen…” I begin slowly. What do I say? Jordan’s eyes wander to mine and I know I have to say something. “You’re going to get through this. You can get your band back together and everything will be okay.”
    He stands and his plate tumbles off his lap and lands on the floor, the contents of his lunch spilling around his feet. “You’re full of shit,” he says bitterly. “You can’t just wipe the slate clean. No one forgets the mistakes you make, no matter what they say.”
    I know he’s not talking about the mistakes I’ve made, but it feels like his words are pointed straight at me. Heat rises to my cheeks and I stare down at my worn boots. Would he speak to me so harshly if he knew about my life? Do I share with him my past to help guide him toward his future? Before I have time to really consider opening up to him, he stumbles out of the living room, through the front door, and out of the house.
     

 
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
    Chapter 13
     
     
    Jordan
     
    I crash out of the house like a bull charging through a china shop. I understand the expression now—things topple in my wake and at this given moment I couldn’t care less. I have to get out of this house and all things that point to what a failure I am, just like my father told me I was my entire life. Back in high school I used to run competitively, and since striking out on my own, or with the band anyway, I haven’t run at all. In fact, other than the occasional weight-lifting sessions at random hotels, I haven’t done much exercising.
    I fill my lungs with air and take off down the front porch steps and race across the expanse of green grass. I haven’t made it a hundred yards before my lungs burn and my thighs feel like they’re being stretched across a hot fire. I’m partway through the canopy of trees before I realize that once again I am without shoes. God, I need to get some.
    The leafy canopy above mesmerizes me with the swaying branches and sunlit patterns shifting through the green. I collapse against the trunk of one of the massive trees and allow myself to catch my breath. In through the nose, out through the mouth, that’s the quickest way to get everything back in sync. At least that’s what I tell myself, but it’s not working. My heart is speeding up rather than slowing, and sweat is gathering along my forehead and slowly dripping down my back. The ground feels as if it’s shaking from within, something deep and terrifying slithering just below the surface, ready to burst through the growth and swallow me whole. And I would gladly accept this death. Let the darkness take me, let the world forget Jordan Capshaw and the walking pool of filth and hatred he is. Let the beast plow forth, clamp down with its massive jaws and salivating maw over my body. Let it tear me apart, taking me bit by bit so that those I have wronged will feel the release of their troubles.
    Just take me.
    “Take me now!” Before I realize it, I am screaming at the top of my lungs, and then the ground opens up and I sink beneath the surface.
     

 
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
    Chapter 14
     
     
    Jemma
     
    Even from inside the house I can hear Jordan’s torment. He is not faring well, especially after watching the news. I wish Gran had turned off the broadcast the minute his face lit up the screen.
    On his way out of the house, he left a wake of picture frames on the floor that had been on a side table. I pick them up one by one and then clean up the few bits of broken glass. Near the front door, the hat tree with