Free Outview by Brandt Legg

feeling everything they do.”
    “Like a dream.”
    “But with actual physical pain.”
    Her face saddened.
    “They’re so real, like I’m there but
pressure from all the years between pushes away everything that isn’t in my
immediate view. But lately, the area in focus has been getting larger.”
    “How did you know it was me?”
    “That’s what’s cool about this one. I saw
your eyes going into it and knew you’d be there. That’s never happened before.
But it’s hard to explain, a recognition in the eyes.”
    “Have you ever seen anyone else you know?”
    “Mom, Dustin, and Kyle at various times.”
    “What happened next?”
    “An agonized tragic scream from you as I
died.” Amber reached over, put her arms around me, and pulled me close, her wet
tears on my cheek, the warmth of her breath in my nose, the slight fragrance of
apples as we melted together, embracing sisters across a century of absence. I
know we stayed like that for several minutes, and when we fell back to this
time Amber was staring into my eyes through blurry tears. She gave me the
softest kiss, our lips touching like the brush of a feather. We sat in the car for
a while longer, not in an awkward way, just warm silence. “I should go,” I said,
getting out, surprised how drained I was.
    “Promise you’ll call me from Brookings.”
    “If not before.” I leaned into the window a
moment, then turned and jogged to my house.
    Later, I walked over to Sam’s. “You have to
watch Blindman tonight. It’s great!” He handed it to me once we were
inside.
    “I won’t have time until next week. I’m
leaving early in the morning on a camping trip. That’s why I came over, to tell
you I won’t get to your lawn again until Monday after school.”
    “Great weather for camping! Where you
headed?”
    “Me and a few friends are going to Crater
Lake.”
    “I love it there. Forget the grass. It’ll be
here.”
    “Thanks. Hey, could I ask something without
you thinking I’m crazy.”
    “Try me.”
    “The reason I wanted to know what you
thought about reincarnation is because I keep seeing visions of what I think
are past lives I’ve had, and it’s almost like I’m there. They happen a lot, and
I’m afraid I could be losing it.”
    “You’re not crazy Nate. You’re about one of
the most well-adjusted kids I’ve ever met, mature, responsible, great taste in
films.” He tapped the copy of Blindman I was still holding. If you’re having
visions like that, you should explore them, maybe keep a journal. Have you
talked to your mother about them?”
    “No. I don’t like how she handled things
with Dustin. That’s why I wanted to ask you. I’ve told a couple of close
friends, but I’d like an adult’s point of view. And, well, you’ve been all over
the world and dated Cindy, who was really into reincarnation.”
    “Mindy,” he corrected, smiling. “It’s not as
unusual as you think. In fact, in India and that part of the world, it’s pretty
common. In Tibet, they believe every Dalai Lama over the last seven hundred
years has been the same soul reincarnated, each being an incarnation of the
last. That way they retain the spiritual wisdom acquired over all those
lifetimes. If you thought you were the Dalai Lama, I might wonder, but seeing
pieces of prior lives is fascinating. Write it all down. What a cool movie it
would make: teenager relives past lives.” A great weight lifted as Sam spoke.
He was a successful adult and talked like what was happening was normal. We
spoke for another half hour, and he even gave me Mindy’s number in case I
wanted to talk to someone else.

 
     
    16
     
    Friday, September 19
    By the time the sun made an appearance, we
had Kyle’s car packed with sleeping bags, tent, piles of schoolbooks, three
backpacks, two iPods, and a jammed cooler. Mom was still asleep when we left.
Kyle and I reluctantly left our phones, but Linh brought hers in case something
went wrong but kept the power off. She