Free Against the Wall by Jill Sorenson

fuck,
güey
? You don’t call, and now you act like I’m invisible?”
    I recognize the voice. It’s Junior.
    Relief flows through me like fresh paint. I step toward the car window and lean in, grinning at my best friend. It’s good to see him again. “I thought you were someone else.”
    “Who, Oscar? You fucking killed him, dumbass.”
    I laugh at his dark humor.
    “Get in.”
    “I have to go to work.”
    “When?”
    “Pretty soon. I can’t party.”
    “Who asked you to party? I said get in.”
    Although I know it’s not a good idea to associate with a drug dealer and gang leader if I want to stay clean, I can’t resist. Junior is like a brother to me. He might be the devil on my shoulder, but he’s always got my back.
    I get in.
    He steps on the gas and roars through the parking lot.
    “Who told you I was out?”
    “Conejo saw you. He had an appointment earlier.”
    “I didn’t see him.”
    Junior shrugs, and I realize that he put a call out on me. Conejo is another member of CVL, and he’s a shady motherfucker. He didn’t approach me to say hi because he was instructed not to tip me off.
    I study Junior while he drives, wondering if he has an ulterior motive for tracking me down. He’s stocky and muscular, with a shaved head and a goatee. He looks like the kind of guy who’ll beat you up and steal your girl, and that’s exactly what he is. I don’t want to be on the receiving end of his aggression. He’s a leader, and sometimes a monster. Standing with him is safer than standing against him.
    “You staying with April?” he asks.
    “Yeah.”
    “How is she?”
    “Married. And knocked up.”
    “Still hot?”
    I don’t answer; I don’t have to.
    “Fuck, I’d do her anyway. Cram her even fuller.”
    Junior has always had a crush on April, and he’s never been shy about sharing his sexual thoughts. Actually he’s not shy about anything. He has no boundaries whatsoever. “I’ll tell her you said that.”
    “Tell her I said hi. She’ll get the message.”
    I shake my head at the joke, picturing Noah’s reaction. He’d rearrange Junior’s face.
    “I’ve got a surprise for you.”
    My smile fades. “What?”
    “You’ll see. It’s not far from here.”
    “I only have an hour or two.”
    “
No mames, güey
. It won’t take long.”
    He drives fast enough to make me uneasy, but not so fast that I tell him to slow down. I know from experience that he’ll speed up if I complain. Although he appears healthy, he’s brimming with intensity, hyper-focused on the road. I suspect he’s wired.
    “You gotten laid yet?”
    “Yeah.”
    “With who?
La rubia
?”
    He means Meghan. “No. It wasn’t her.”
    “Who?”
    “Just some girl,” I say, looking out the window. It can’t get around that I slept with Oscar’s ex. Junior would love to needle Eastside by circulating the news. “I met her at the grocery store.”
    He gives me a congratulatory fist bump. “How was she?”
    “Good.”
    “Tight pussy?”
    “Why do you always ask that?”
    “Why not?”
    “She was a nice girl.”
    He smirks at my answer. “What was her name?”
    “Maria Elena,” I say, which is his mother’s name.
    He grabs me by the back of the neck and tries to shove my head down on his lap. It’s one of his signature jokes, inappropriate and threatening and uncomfortably funny. I punch him in the ribs and break free from his grip, doubling over with laughter. He swerves a little but manages to stay on the road.
    “Where did you get this car?” I ask.
    “I bought it last month at a charity auction. Nice, right?”
    “Hell yeah,” I say, envious. It’s a vintage muscle car, expensive without looking flashy. A pang of longing for my old Chevelle squeezes my chest. I miss being behind the wheel, independent and in control.
    We talk about his family for a few minutes. He’s got a cousin in the hospital and he’s been pitching in to pay the bills. Despite his ruthless, reckless behavior, Junior is a