Free Forgive Me by Ashley Beale Page A

wobbling, and everything around me just blurs.
    “Lexi?” I can hear him in the distance but all of a sudden the fading white turns to gray, then into black, and all I can hear are distant echoes of nothingness. My thoughts are scattered and my body warms, contradicting the shaking its currently doing.
    I feel my body getting lifted and carried as though I were a child, until its being laid on a flat surface. I can feel the vibrations of someone speaking but I’m not hearing the words or seeing anything but pitch black. It all fades into less until I’m not seeing, hearing, or feeling anything. Nothing.
    I thought I wanted to feel empty, but really, maybe not so much.
    I’m springing to life when I’m soaked in ice cold water. The breath I inhale burns my throat as my skin crawls in liquid cold. “What the fu-“ I look over and see Zander with a bucket held in front of him, a smug smirk in place of his lips.
    Ass.
    “What happened?” I choose to ask instead of the other.
    His eyebrows shoot up, like I should know. “I’m pretty sure you had an anxiety attack or something.”
    I’ve never had one of those, so that is just weird. I’ve had anxiety, but not to the point of blacking out like that. Maybe I had too much to drink. Four beers the morning after drinking, I really wouldn’t be all that surprised.
    He pulls some of my gym shorts and a new tank top out of my top drawer, then he digs through the next two doors until I’m thrown a sports bra and a pair of my embarrassing cotton underwear. “Get dressed before you get hypothermia.”
    “Yeah, because I’m going to get that when its over a hundred degrees out.” I get out of bed anyways, and start immediately stripping it from its bedding.
    I’m pushed aside my Zander as he finishes what I was doing. “Get dressed,” he barks out. With a roll of my eyes, I pick up the clothing and march across the hall into Justin’s room to quickly get dressed. When I walk back into the guest room, Zander is laying towels down on the bed, soaking up the water.
    That should teach him.
    “Why would you pour water on me like that, anyways?”
    His body tenses but he doesn’t answer and he doesn’t face me. He continues soaking up the water on the mattress, and I continue watching his muscles flex. He certainly works hard, that much is for sure. I only wish I could see him in his dirty work attire, boots and hat, dripping in sweat. I already know its got to be one of the best views. Better than a sunset, or a blue jay perched on a tree, or a baby fawn running asides its mother.
    “Stop biting that damn lip and talk to me,” Zander orders. My eyes immediately snap to his and I realize that I was mentally undressing him, with my eyes where they sure as hell shouldn’t be, and he most definitely just caught me. Oops. Damn those beers and this hot guy.
    I clear my throat and pull out my hair tie, giving me something to do. We continue a stare down while I comb my fingers through my now damp hair, and I fix my side braid. He waits patiently until its fixed, and continues waiting until I fix my somewhat smudged makeup in the full length mirror. As I’m about to turn around, I catch his eye sight in the mirror from behind me. His eyes roam my body, even though you can’t see my curves in my sportswear.
    “Almost ten years,” he says out of the blue.
    I just nod my head, staring at him. I’m pretty sure he is eyeing my ass right now, but I don’t say as much. His goes down towards my calves and quickly make their way back up. When they rest back on mine, he hypnotizes me to stay in the same spot as he takes a few steps forward, standing directly behind me. My body is all too aware of him standing so close, like its magnetized to his. My heart a negative, his a positive, and they’re making a zing filled charge, connecting us in a hyperaware power.
    “Lexi,” his voice caresses my name. Much different than earlier, when he was angered and distraught.
    I swallow