Free Talk Sexy to the One You Love by Barbara Keesling

with his concept. Personally, I think men spend a lot more time envying penises than women do (which may be why men take so long to shower after the big game).
    But you have to give Siggie credit where credit is due.
    He took the word out of the closet and put it on the tip of our tongues, and that makes him A-okay in my book.
    Do you think the word penis is sexy? It’s certainly a lot sexier than vagina , that’s for sure. But I have to admit, I can think of a lot of other words and phrases that make a man’s penis seem a lot sexier (I think I lost count at around sixty). Can you? It’s time to find out. Exercise 13 is my little homage to the man who gave me my career. Enjoy it—I think he would have.
    Exercise 13: Freudian Slip
    (SOLO)
    Open your notebook to a fresh page. At the top of the page, write down the word penis . Underneath the word penis , write down as many words and phrases your can think of that are synonymous with penis (sexy, slang, anatomical, literary, etc.), placing an asterisk next to the ones that turn you on most.
    The first two words that always come to my mind both have four letters and end in - ck . I think of them both every time I look at my watch
    His Precious Parts / 83
    since one rhymes with tick and one rhymes with tock.
    But there are oh-so-many more. There’s member , for example, and manhood and prick and hard-on and schlong and pole and staff and weapon and tool and thing and jade stalk . And what about words that describe the tip of his penis—words like head, helmet , and crown . I think it’s pretty obvious that I could go on and on, but this is your exercise. Let’s see just how long a list you can come up with. (See Sample Page 13).
    Sample Page 13
    (COPY AND COMPLETE)
    Penis
    _________________________________________________________
    _________________________________________________________
    _________________________________________________________
    _________________________________________________________
    Exercise 13a: Cigar Aficionado
    (SOLO)
    Find a comfortable chair to sit in, or lie down on your bed. You might enjoy taking your clothes off for this exercise, but it is not necessary. You also might enjoy having your favorite vibrator and a fresh set of batteries nearby.
    I want you to think about the word penis . Now close your eyes and try to visualize your lover’s penis. As you are doing this, slowly mouth the word penis without trying to make any sound. Just feel the way your tongue and lips move as you say it. Say it again.
    And again. And again.
    84 / Talk Sexy to the One You Love
    Now, in the lowest of whispers, whisper the word penis . Whisper it again and again and again. Keep your eyes closed and keep thinking about your lover’s penis. Think about the way it looks; think about what it feels like inside of you. Keep whispering.
    Whisper the word a little louder. Louder still. And louder still. Once you have reached the level of a stage whisper, you can stop. After you have stopped whispering, keep your eyes closed for a little while longer and let the image of your lover’s penis linger. Now open your eyes.
    Repeat this process for all of the words and phrases on your “penis” list, paying special attention to the ones you marked with an asterisk.
    The Right Stuff
    There’s an old Lithuanian expression my great-aunt was fond of quoting that goes something like this: “A penis does not a man make.” (Actually, the translation is mine, since she never did learn to speak English.) She was so right. I think testicles are fascinating and fabulous. And I know very few women who aren’t totally turned on by a man’s butt. Men even have sexy nipples (though they can be a bit hard to find sometimes if the guy is kind of hairy). Frankly, I don’t think this is quite what my great-aunt had in mind; I think she was trying to be a bit more profound. But it’s what she should have had in mind. It’s certainly what’s in His Precious Parts / 85
    my mind right