Free The Rebuilding Year by Kaje Harper

gone after the next new thing. The old Ryan did sex. He didn’t do relationships.
    So he hadn’t had the right to complain when Marla, the current flavor of the month when he was injured, took one look at his hospitalized corpse and said no thank you. He hadn’t wanted her around anyway. At first it was the pain. Then the work of healing and rebuilding had taken all his energy. He hadn’t had time for anyone, not even family. And then there were the scars.
    Ryan flushed, remembering, and drank deeply to cover it. The waitress was passing by, and he grabbed her arm to order a refill. She smiled perfunctorily, but the new glass arrived promptly. He tipped her well.
    He drank again slowly. Once, when he’d nearly healed, he’d thought he might try dating. He’d wanted to be sure everything…worked. But the girl he’d hooked up with had been too lightweight for him to go through with it. Even Ryan had his limits, and…he closed his eyes. Not remembering. Not thinking about that. He had been the one to get up out of the bed and leave, after all. He clung to that.
    “Are you okay?” John asked.
    “I’m fine.” Ryan opened his eyes and looked around again. He was looking for someone a little older. Older but hot, of course. Someone who would be up for a little recreational activity without making too much out of it. But intelligent enough not to be totally fixated on appearances. You could add wealthy to that list, owns a Ferrari, wants to put you through med school. Not asking too much, right?
    He shook his head. Shut up. I just want to get laid. “So,” he said to John, “who do you think is the hottest woman in here?”
    John looked startled. Ryan realized that for all the stuff they talked about, he and John seldom discussed sex. He wasn’t sure why, they just didn’t. But John looked around willingly enough and then pointed discreetly. “Over there in the red dress.”
    “Her?” Ryan took a closer look. “Jesus, she’s a kid half your age. They should card her twice.”
    “You said hottest, not the one I would go for,” John pointed out mildly. “I still have eyes and she still has…um.”
    “Tits.”
    “Oh yeah.”
    “So who would you go for, if you were looking for a date?”
    John took a longer look. “Maybe the blonde with the blue blouse. She looks cute but smart. Or did you mean just a pickup?”
    Ryan winced, which annoyed him. This was obviously why he didn’t talk about sex with John. Because it somehow came out too…significant. “Yeah, a hookup for the night.”
    “Hm. Hard to judge if a woman is the type.” John frowned. “Over there, the three woman at the corner table. All fairly cute, the right age, a little drunk and egging each other on. One of them might go for it.”
    Ryan looked over. He hadn’t had to chase a woman in forever. When you wore the uniform, unless you were a slug, they would come to you. Those girls were okay, he guessed. Two brunettes and an obvious bottle blonde. They were drinking mixed drinks and laughing a little too loudly. And eyeing the men at the bar.
    “Good eye,” he said. “You going to go for it?”
    John colored. “Not my thing. I don’t date much, and I like to get to know someone pretty well before I take them to bed.”
    Ryan tossed back the last of his beer and stood, leaving the cane under the table. “Then wish me luck.”
    John looked startled, but didn’t comment.
    Ryan walked toward the women, keeping his stride as even as he possibly could. The beer wasn’t helping, but he disguised a lurch as an effort to dodge the waitress. The women were still smiling as he reached their table.
    “I couldn’t help but notice you ladies laughing,” he said with his best charming smile. “Are we men really that amusing to you, or are you all just in a really good mood?”
    They looked him up and down with frank appraisal, and then the blonde slid around and tapped one long lacquered nail on the single free chair. “Why don’t you have