Free Fire & Water by Betsy Graziani Fasbinder Page A

you?”
    Jake’s shoulders slumped. “There’s a lot more to the story.”
    “Ain’t there always?”
    Hot anger burned in me. “That was a long time ago,” I said, surprised by my urge to defend Jake. “Jake’s told me that he and his father have a tumultuous relationship.”
    Mary K stood up suddenly, ignoring Jake. “Just pay attention, Murphy,” she said, her eyes boring their gaze into mine. “Thanks for the bubbles and the book. Turns out I’ve got a date after all. I’m sure you guys will enjoy the privacy.”
    I tried to draw a breath, unsure of what had just happened. Mary K wore a smug grimace. “I won’t be home until tomorrow morning—late,” she said. “The weather is nasty, so I don’t want to bring Ben out into it. Can you keep your eye on the mutt until I’m back? I don’t think he should be alone.”
    I wrestled my confusion. “Don’t worry. I’ll watch him,” I said. On cue, Ben lifted his head.
    “I already injected him, but this dampness is really pounding his old bones. He may need another morphine shot before bed.”
    Before I could respond, Mary K kissed Ben, grabbed her coat, and flew out the door. The candles all flickered with the gust of air that blasted in her wake.
    Jake refilled our wine glasses. “Well, that was fun.”
    “I don’t know what got into her.”
    “I’m kind of used to my family name evoking a certain range of extreme responses.”
    “You could’ve told me about that,” I said.
    “You knew my name.”
    “You know what I mean.” I felt foolish and clueless for not having put the pieces of Jake’s identity together on my own.
    “What was I supposed to tell you? That my dad is one of the richest motherfuckers ever? That his name is on the side of half a dozen high-rises and twenty different companies? Should I have explained how, when I found out that my dad had bribed a woman he didn’t deem suitable for my station to break up with me, it enraged me so much that I picked up what I thought was an unloaded pistol from his gun cabinet and aimed it at him in front of about three hundred rich people at a cocktail party? When it went off, I nearly fainted. His influence kept me out of jail, on the condition that I go into inpatient psychiatric care. What would all that have meant, Kat, if I told you?”
    “I’ll admit, it requires some explanation, but it doesn’t have to mean anything. It’s just information about who you are, is all. I told you about my family. When I asked you about yours all you said was, We’re not very close .”
    “We’re not.”
    “Why the secrecy?”
    “I have no secrets, Kat. I’ll tell you anything.” Jake ran his fingers through his hair. “I just like it when I meet somebody who doesn’t think they already know everything there is to know about me because of my last name. You can’t believe everything you read. I’m not my dad. We haven’t had contact in years.”
    “None? No contact at all?”
    “He sends fat checks every birthday and Hanukah. I never cash them. That’s how we talk. He talks with money. I talk by rejecting it. Not exactly father and son of the year.”
    “So, the gun. Do you make a habit of shooting people?” My heart hammered against my ribs.
    “That was by far the dumbest thing I ever did. My dad is unbelievable. But I wouldn’t have intentionally shot him.”
    “And the psychiatric treatment?”
    Jake paused. “I was pretty troubled. After that I broke the connection with my dad. Burt became family. That’s what I needed to do to have a good life.” Jake reached and took my hand, rubbing my knuckles with his thumb. “My family is—I hope this won’t spoil things for us.”
    An image of my mother’s body flashed into my mind—small and fragile, lying in the satin-lined casket at St. Anne’s. Knowing that she’d killed herself felt like a shameful, sorrowful stain on what I’d always thought of as my ideal family. “Nobody’s family is perfect. I guess yours is just