Free Queen of This Realm by Jean Plaidy Page B

climax. In fact I wanted to be in a constant state of being wooed, and never won.
    And this was what life was offering me.
    Thomas enjoyed it too, for marriage was quite out of the question. Wasn't he married already? Unable to get the Princess, he had taken the Queen. He was enamored of me. There was no doubt of that. I supposed there must be some fascination in seducing a royal virgin for a man who has become blasé in his amours. He was always teasing me and he would make Katharine join in and she seemed to think it was delightful that her husband should be so fond of me. I was like a daughter, she said. In fact she had always thought of herself as my mother rather than my stepmother.
    And so we went on during the autumn days of that year which had begun with the death of my father.
    Jane Grey had become part of our household. She joined me in the schoolroom. I was not really jealous of her scholastic attainments. Mine were more than enough for any tutor to marvel at and Jane was inclined to hide her light under a bushel while I let mine blaze forth like the midday sun. It was true. Jane was quiet and retiring, almost apologizing for her very existence; whereas I was growing more imperious every day, blossoming under Thomas Seymour's admiration.
    I was a little annoyed when he showed too much attention to Jane. He never actually flirted with her. Thomas was too clever for that. Jane might not have understood his meaning but she would have been horrified if she did. It seemed to me that Thomas showed a different side of himself to us all. He was the loving and tender husband to Katharine; he was benignly avuncular with Jane; and to me he was the reckless adventurer who was ready to risk everything for a smile—and more if he could get it—from me.
    I laughed at him. I was very contented. I had become wise enough to know that this was the best way of enjoying his company.
    Kat knew exactly why he wanted Jane Grey under our roof.
    “She is destined for our little King,” she said. “Thomas will get his revenge on his brother who is putting forward his own daughter Jane. But it is our Thomas who has the King's ear and I'll swear King Edward will go the way Uncle Thomas wants him to.”
    “He is a very scheming man,” I said severely.
    “Bless him. Let him be. He's the most handsome gentleman at Court…or at any court, I might say. He is charming to all, and men like that should be forgiven their sins.”
    Such a state of affairs could not continue. I should have known that. The Admiral was growing more and more reckless and I was becoming more and more fascinated. It surprised me that, loving my stepmother as I did, I could have indulged, to the extent I did, in this covert if innocent relationship with her husband; but his admiration was so stimulating and our teasing meetings gave a spice to my days. Moreover there was Kat to giggle with. She made up fantastic and titillating stories about the Admiral and myself, and I would lie in my bed and listen to them while we laughed together. I knew that I was in a dangerous situation, but life would have lost its savor if that danger had been entirely removed.
    I was growing out of childhood. Less than a year ago I had not thought of the possibility of wearing a crown; and in addition the most fascinating man at Court was enamored of me. I was after all only just fourteen, so I have the excuse of youth to offer.
    We were approaching a climax. Perhaps it began on that day when I had my new dress. It was a black velvet which Kat said was a little old for my years. But I adored it. It made my white skin look whiter and it seemed to set my hair on fire by its very contrast. It was low-cut and I looked at least two years older in it. I longed to see Thomas's face when he beheld me in it. The dress was a kind of challenge. You can't pretend I'm a child anymore, it said.
    I tried it on one afternoon and preened before Kat.
    “You look like a queen already,” was her comment.