Free Jack, Knave and Fool by Bruce Alexander

shouted at him. “And I have no letter to deliver!”
    In response he stood and blinked three times. At last he spoke, apparently unperturbed: “What is it, then, that you wish?”
    “I believe you have a crew of carpenters working in the house installing a water closet.”
    “That is correct.”
    “Bring me their chief. I wish to speak with him.”
    A direct order. Reader, how good that felt!
    “Uh … well …yes, I shall. Would … would you care to wait in the vestibule? It’s rather chilly this morning.”
    That surprised me so that I very nearly failed to thank him. But thank him I did and stepped inside, taking a place beside the bench whereon I had waited on those occasions when the butler had deemed me properly dressed to enter the residence of the Lord Chief Justice.
    “You may seat yourself, if you like.”
    “No, I prefer to stand.”
    “As you wish,” said he, backing away. “Uh … tell me, is this about the vase?”
    “I know nothing of a vase. The chief carpenter, if you please.”
    He nodded, turned, and hurried off. It could not have been more than three minutes that elapsed before he returned with a short, wiry little man in tow. The chief carpenter was dressed roughly for work; I noted bits of sawdust on his breeches. He looked around him curiously as he approached, and it occurred to me likely that this was his first visit to this part of the house. At a certain point the butler hung back, though well within eavesdropping distance, and allowed the man to proceed to me.
    “What can I do foryez?” the fellow asked. He seemed to be Irish. So many in the building trades were.
    “First, let me ask you,” said I, “what is your name, sir?”
    “Dismas Cullen and proud of it. Now you must tell me the what of this matter.”
    “Gladly,” said I to him. “I am from the Bow Street Court. A man held prisoner on a minor matter of public drunkenness has escaped my custody. He said he was in your employ, and was on his way to borrow from you the ten shillings’ fine that would keep him out of gaol. I am sure he has not come here, for he well knows this is the first place I would look for him. But I have come to you first, to ask you to hold him for us if he does show his lace. And secondly, to ask you for information you may have that will aid us in finding him.”
    “It’s Thomas Roundtreeyou’re speaking of, now ain’t it?”
    “Did I not say so? Forgive me. Yes, it is.”
    “Well, let me set you straight. He ain’t in my employ no more. Friday night alter we left work here, they found a vase of some value, Chinese it was. had gone missing, and they let us know on Saturday morning that we was suspect.
    Now, I was damn certain I didn’t take it. And I was sure about three of the crew because they are my son, my brother, and my brother-in-law. I could vouch for all but Roundtree. So we marched him back to his room in Half-Moon Passage and looked the place through, but no such thing was to be found there. This I reported to the Lord Chief Justice hisself, and he said there was no certain evidence against the fellow, but he wanted him here no longer. Nor did I. So I pays him off, I did, and sends him on his way, all the time him telling us how innocent he is. We four family have worked in many homes of the gentry and the nobility and never had no trouble like this before.”
    “Soyou would not have loaned him the ten shillings in any case?”
    “Hah! No chance of it. The way the Lord Chief Justice handled the matter, he subtracts the worth of the vase from what he pays me when this job is done —five guineas, if you please! We’ll make precious little profit on this water closet. He said it was my fault for hiring him. And you look at it his way, and he’s right. Loan Roundtree ten shillings indeed! That’ll be a cold day in hell!”
    “Well,” I asked, ‘why did you hire him? What did you know of him?”
    “Not enough. My youngest brother went back to County Wexford to visit our