Free Will & Patrick Meet the Mob by Leta Blake, Alice Griffiths

his hand. He almost pulls it away, but he endures her touch, rage churning in his stomach. “It was in slow motion,” she whispers, staring urgently into his eyes. “Finding you on the floor of your room. Calling the ambulance. Waiting while they took you back. When they escorted me into your hospital room, it smelled like death. Your death.”
    Will’s so tired of this one long-ago night boxing him in. “I told you before, Mom, check me out. Not dead.”
    “No, you’re not. But that night you might as well have been. No one was offering up much hope. I was out of my mind. You were unconscious, so maybe you don’t understand what I went through. I was the one who heard that fear in the nurses’ voices as they treated you. I’m the one who heard them say your blood had, and I quote, ‘the acidity of a battery.’”
    “That’s not even possible.”
    “I’m the one the doctor suggested go pray in the chapel.”
    “Mom—”
    “No, you listen to me, William Patterson.” She swallows hard and blinks back tears. “I know I haven’t been the best mother. I know I shouldn’t have relied on Ryan to make sure you were taking care of yourself, but it was the only way I knew how to cope with my fear for you.” She pushes a fallen strand of golden hair out of her eyes. “Your entire adolescence was a minefield of difficulties for our family.” She grips his fingers and squeezes hard. “Gay? Okay, we can deal with that. Diabetes? Fine. We can deal with that too. But then along came alcoholism and, honey, I didn’t know where to start.”
    Will closes his eyes. Shame and guilt stir in him, waking up from their all-too-short nap.
    “I didn’t know how to help you. The other day, you asked why always I took Ryan’s side. Well, it’s because Ryan always promised he’d look after you. He promised with his help, you’d stay sober, and I wanted— needed —to believe that.”
    “So you wouldn’t have to worry about me.”
    “So I could forget that night in the hospital!”
    “Yes, and move on with your newest lover.”
    “William!”
    “Mom, I thought you were being honest with me?”
    “I am. All right, yes, relying on Ryan let me get back to my own life. But Will, I trusted Ryan because you encouraged me to. You promised he was what you wanted, that he was good for you. You swore he kept you safe. You said he took care of you. And you always said the fights were your fault. You blamed yourself. You claimed he wasn’t the problem, you were. Was I supposed to think you were lying?”
    “Yes! You didn’t believe anything else I said, why believe that? Because it made your life easier! And, yeah, you should have had more faith in me than I had in myself. I’m your son!”
    “How? When you’ve acted out so much over the years! Everything you told me about your behavior and Ryan’s part in your life was in line with what I’d seen in your past. I’m sorry if you don’t want to hear that.”
    Will stares at her, his breath heavy as a horse’s after a long run. “Do you want to know the truth about Ryan?”
    She blanches and looks away.
    “Don’t worry, I’m not going to give you dirty details. But when I say now that Ryan wasn’t good to me, you need to believe me. If you were willing to believe me back then, be willing to believe me now.”
    “Listen to yourself. You’re admitting that you lied to me about Ryan but now you want me to believe you about Patrick. Don’t you see my conundrum?”
    Will rubs his hands over his face. “Things are different now. Patrick’s good to me. As a friend, as a husband, and, yes, as a lover.”
    “I don’t understand your attraction to him.”
    “We might not be typical lovers but we’re care about each other. For the first time in my life, I’m proud of who I am and what I feel when I’m with him.”
    Kimberly’s eyes go wide. “Are you…” She shudders a little before continuing. “Are you saying you think you’re in love with him?”
    “No,