Free Playing for the Other Team by Sage C. Holloway

to think about whether they were a good idea. But they were true, and Jasper had a general idea of how I felt about him anyway.
    He looked surprised, though. “Would you really?”
    It wasn’t even a contest. Assorted random idiots and their opinions would not be able to stand in the way of some quality hand-holding time with Jasper, if only he’d consent. Even if I’d been worried about the backlash it might create at school—and, to be honest, a small part of me was —I was out of the place in a few weeks. My mother already hated me. Things couldn’t get any worse on that front either, if word got back to her. The only one I really needed to take aside soon was Trip, before he heard it from Nova.
    “Yeah, really,” I finally answered. He didn’t seem to know what to say to that, and it felt a little awkward, so I plowed right on to the next topic. “Lip gloss, huh?”
    He laughed at that. “Honestly, I don’t recommend it. You just end up eating it all with your lunch. And that’s kind of gross if you really think about it. I’m not sure how girls go through that all the time.”
    “Yeah, gross.” I made a face. “Still, that would have been an interesting sight, you and lip gloss.”
    “Maybe I’ll put some on, just for you.”
    That simple statement shouldn’t have made me melt, but it totally did.
    Just for you.
    “I really don’t mean to be teasing you,” he added, and I realized my facial expression must have been giving away my thoughts. “That’d be a pretty fucked-up thing to do after…”
    “Turning me down?” I finished for him when he hesitated.
    He sighed a little. “I come with way more baggage than you think, sunshine. I’m crap at relationships, but I don’t do casual either. Kinda wish I could, with you.” He gave me a sad, rueful smile. “And either way, even if it miraculously worked out, then we’d still have to say good-bye come fall, and I’d have a hell of a time getting over you. See how that would be unpleasant any way you slice it?”
    A painful lump formed in my throat. “So my timing really is horrible, isn’t it?”
    “Yes,” Jasper said tightly, pressed his lips together, and stuffed his hands into the pockets of his jeans. Even though he was still right next to me, the distance between us seemed to have increased by about a mile.
    We remained silent the rest of the way, twenty minutes of nothing but the sound of traffic. Eventually Jasper turned and led me into a tall apartment building. It was a bleak, impersonal place, not at all how I would have pictured Jasper’s home. Our steps echoed in the empty stairwell as we made our way to the fifth floor. The silence was starting to weigh heavily on me, but I had no idea what to say. It didn’t get much better when he unlocked the door to his place and motioned for me to step inside.
    “My mom should be here in about an hour and a half,” Jasper said, shifting uneasily as I glanced at the mostly bare walls. “I think my sister has after-school stuff going on. And, um, my dad…he’ll be here later tonight.”
    I studied him mutely. He seemed more awkward than I’d ever seen him before. I wasn’t sure why. Maybe it was my mere presence in his home. “You know, if you don’t want me to be here, I understand.”
    Jasper had lowered his head, but at my words, it shot back up, his eyes widening.
    “I get it,” I continued. “If I make you uncomfortable—”
    “No,” he interrupted me. “No, I…” He closed his eyes, opened them, took a deep breath, balled his hands into fists, and released them again. “Of course I want you here,” he said roughly. “Of course I… God, Bry.”
    I didn’t even register what was happening when he came closer and flung his arms around my neck. When he clung to me, I held him entirely on reflex, and he buried his face in my shoulder and dug his fingers into the muscles of my back as though to emphasize that letting go was not an option. My entire body buzzed with